A Change of History
by dragonyfox
Summary: What if Team Seven had gotten some training from other sources like the rest of the Rookie Nine had? Sakura: Demonic Illusionist. Sasuke: Invisible Hunter. Naruto: Leaf's Puppeteer. Witness a change of history.
1. Pre-Series

**I somehow got sucked back into Naruto, and since it's November, I thought I'd go ahead and do this for NaNo.**

**And, please, I know literally nothing past the Gaara retrieval arc in Shippuden, so don't pester me with "oh that's not canon anymore" because i don't know any better.**

**Also, i apologize ahead of time for the potty mouth narrator, and any grammatical errors that might occur. i just skimmed it with SpellCheck because it's NaNo- you're not supposed to edit!**

**.**

**.**

**.**

Three teenage shinobi traded triumphant glances.

"Man, I can't believe we made it this far!" the blond said, pulling his two puppets back to him with a twitch of two fingers.

The only girl shrugged. "We were fighting sound ninja, what do you expect? They're pathetic."

"No, no. I mean, you and Sasuke have pretty much gotten your dreams! I know I'm still a while away from becoming Hokage, but still!"

"Oh. Well, no. I never though you and me would get this far. You were the village idiot for four years before you vanished off the face of the earth." The girl said, "But Sasuke? Even after I stopped being a fangirl, I knew Sasuke would achieve his goals."

The dark haired boy shrugged. "Honestly, the only thing I'm surprised about us is the nicknames we were given."

The blonde boy laughed. "Yeah. The 'Invisible Hunter' is kind of a stupid nickname."

"Like 'Leaf's Puppeteer' is any better? It's boring, that's what it is." The girl laughed back.

"Okay, Miss 'Demonic Illusionist'!"

The dark haired boy stopped any further argument. "Children, children. Settle down. Naruto, get Fox back over here with our target, we should start making our way back home before the council thinks we finally went rouge."

"Yes sir, Hunter Sir!" the blonde said with a salute.

The dark haired one rolled his eyes and started walking in the direction of the village and Sakura kept pace with him. A few moments later, Naruto, Fox, and a cat caught up with them, and the cat jumped into Sasuke's arms, purring quietly as the three shinobi chatted, calmly ignoring their prisoner's shouts of rage.

.

.

.

Naruto sprinted though the wide hallways to the Hokage's office. The old man HAD to let him go to the academy this time! He was gonna be wowed by Naruto's new jutsu! Last time, the old man said that if Naruto came up with an original jutsu, he could go to the academy early!

"Old man-!"

"No, Naruto. You cannot attend the academy until you are six, and you know this."

"But I made a new-!"

The old man smiled, but cut him off. "I've already heard about it. It's just a variation of the henge, so no."

Naruto's head fell in disappointment. He was so close this time…

"But…" the Hokage said in a thoughtful tone. "I suppose if you want to get ahead that badly… hmm."

Naruto perked up and bolted up to the Hokage's desk. "What? What's that 'Hmm' for?"

The Hokage smirked slightly. "The Kazekage, the Sand village's leader, has sent me a letter regarding our recent peace talks. He has proposed a way to cement the alliance between our villages by trading one pre-academy student for a few years. Long enough to learn a ninja art from one of the other village's experts."

"Like what?"

"Well, I've offered Jiraiya of the Sanin as a Seal expert, and Kakashi, a Jonin, as a ninjutsu expert, and…"

Naruto shook his head. "I got that part. I mean what's Sand offering. You want me to go right?"

The old man seemed surprised at his insightfulness. "Well, yes, actually. I had hoped that it might keep you out of trouble and give you that boost you so desire."

"So what're they offering?" Naruto asked slowly, hoping the Hokage would understand his question this time.

"Puppetry, a Wind expert if you've got wind as your chakra element, and Poisons."

Naruto tilted his head to the side. "Puppetry?"

The Hokage seemed surprised that, of the three, Naruto was most interested in the puppets.

"It is an art… not dissimilar to how the Inuzuka clan uses dogs. It turns puppets into tools. There are a few rather famous Puppeteers, but the two that come to mind most easily are Sasori of the Red Sands and Elder Chiyo, the woman who taught him." he began explaining. "Sasori is known for, and was… kicked out of Sand for, Human Puppets. He turned corpses into puppets. Elder Chiyo is one of best puppet users alive today, and she is the one who offered to teach whoever I deign to send, if whoever I send is capable of learning."

"I wanna do that." Naruto decided.

"Really? Are you sure, Naruto? It requires very fine chakra control, and you have troubles with the clone technique…"

The boy hit his hand on the Hokage's desk. "Then I'll teach myself super chakra control and I'm gonna learn this! A Hokage has to be strong and have super cool techniques!"

The Hokage held his hands up in appeasement. "If you're sure, I'll get someone to teach you while they're delivering you to Sand."

Naruto fist-pumped and waited to be sent off.

"Run along now. You'll leave when I get a letter from the Kazekage. If you like, you can try to convince a Jonin or a Chunin to teach you chakra control…"

"Really? Sweet!" Naruto shouted, running off.

He didn't see the relieved sigh the Hokage left off after he left.

"Thank god. Now, maybe, he won't have to deal with so much hatred towards him. He's a child, he doesn't deserve it."

.

.

.

Sakura hid behind a tree to hide her tears from the cruel girls who had been taunting her with her ugliness and about her huge forehead.

A kunoichi not well known for her kindness approached the crying young girl. She remembered when she would cry and nobody would even blink twice at her, and she'd be damned if she let that happen to another little girl- especially one that the Interrogation Squad of Konoha was mildly interested in.

"Hey, are you okay, kid?"

Sakura jumped and let out a shriek of surprise.

"Whoa, easy there! I didn't actually mean to scare you!"

"I-it's okay…" Sakura replied after her heart slowed to a normal pace.

"Why were you crying, kid?"

Sakura sniffed. "Cause I'm ugly."

"I don't think you're ugly."

Sakura looked up to get a good look at just who was telling such lies. It was an older teenager, with odd purple hair and eyes. She wore an outfit that would surely give her mother a seizure if she were to see it on her, of a trench coat and a fishnet body suit.

"Well, I think you're lying to make me feel better."

The older girl shook her head. "I'm not lying. You have the nicest hair I've ever seen. And this is coming from a girl with purple hair."

"So? The other girls think I'm ugly."

"Well, I think those other girls are just jealous. You have beautiful hair, and pretty green eyes, and I bet they're all boring blonde and boring brunette."

"Kiara has red hair." Sakura argued.

The Chunin smirked. "Pink's more interesting than red."

"Well, my forehead's still too big!"

The Chunin frowned. "Let me see."

Sakura shook her head.

Rolling her eyes, the Chunin reached out and (extremely, as she had a habit of underestimating her own strength) gently pulled Sakura's hair from her face. Sakura watched as the ninja tilted her head to the side in thought before reaching into her pocket and pulling out a bright green ribbon.

"My friend, Kurenai, gave me this. You'll look great in green." The kunoichi explained. "Here, I'll tie your hair up with it, okay?"

Sakura just held still while the ninja tied her hair back with the ribbon.

"Now look." She ordered, handing Sakura a pocket mirror.

Sakura found her reflection and stared in surprise. She actually looked kinda… cute. Shocked, she looked up to the Ninja's face.

"My name's Anko. How about I walk you home?" In a fit of what she would later call 'temporary insanity', and would threaten grievous bodily harm to any who argued, she decided to play pretend with the little girl. "I'll be your bodyguard against the evil witches who want to steal your beauty!"

The newly named Anko stood and held out a hand for Sakura to take.

Smiling, Sakura took the offered hand. "I'll lead the way, Anko-nii-chan!"

It was a surprisingly short walk back to Sakura's home. Sakura thanked Anko and ran inside the open door.

"Actually, Sakura, could you go get your mum for me? I have something I want to talk to her about." Anko said after a moment's thought.

"Is she in trouble?"

Anko laughed. "No, I just want to run something past her, that's all."

Sakura shrugged and skipped towards the kitchen. Anko hurriedly buttoned up her coat a little, to seem more presentable. A moment later, a woman with darker pink hair came to the front door, drying her hands with a dishtowel.

"Can I help you?" the woman asked warily.

Anko smiled disarmingly. "I was wondering if you knew that your daughter wanted to be a ninja, and if you would be willing to let me teach her a few things."

"I knew. Teach her things like…?"

"Well, I am a Special Jonin…"

.

.

.

Sasuke held his cat gently while he was walking with his father.

"Father, where are we going?"

"Since you are so set on keeping that stray, I decided to call on a favor. A fellow shinobi owes me a favor, and they can teach you how to work with your cat."

Sasuke scratched behind Kitty's ear. "But Father, why can't I just teach myself?"

"Yes I suppose you could, but if you want to be the best, which you do, then you'll need some training to get there faster. Though I still don't see why you insist upon keeping the little fleabag." his father growled, glaring at the grey-furred cat in Sasuke's arms.

Sasuke glared back. "Itachi nii-san said that ninjas can have animals as partners, and I'm gonna train Kitty to be my partner!"

His Father nodded. "That's why I'm bringing you to someone who can teach you how to use your ninken- er… nin'neko? Properly."

The cat purred loudly.

Sasuke knew his father thought he was silly for wanting to keep the cat, and knew that he had increased the value of the cat by giving it a purpose so noble in his father's mind. But, Sasuke also knew, that he was right. The cat, Kitty, would be an excellent partner.

Sasuke had found the cat as a kitten a year ago, nearly starved to death, covered in fleas, and torn to shreds. The dark grey cat still had the scars from her time before Sasuke, but her fur had grown back in and she wasn't so skinny. Sasuke's mother had fought for him to keep the cat.

His mother had argued many different points: it would teach him responsibility, it'll make him more open, it'll keep him sane when he becomes a ninja, it'll make him happy, it'll keep him busy. And all of those points had proven true so far, of the ones that could be proven in less than a year. Sasuke was the one who fed Kitty, usually from his own bowl, Sasuke talked to Kitty all the time, Sasuke loved playing with Kitty, which kept him both busy and happy.

And Kitty never left him alone. His mother thought it was odd, but didn't say anything for fear of his father taking it as a bad thing and getting rid of the cat. Kitty didn't even leave when Sasuke was training, which had led to quite a handful of near misses and accidents involving poorly thrown kunai and shuriken.

Kitty would usually hiss and puff up until Sasuke had apologized an acceptable amount of times, at which point the cat would let they boy baby and coddle her.

Sasuke was startled at the sound of barking, and the scent of wet dog. That meant they had to be in the Inuzuka compound! Sasuke's father led him between buildings, and Sasuke eyed the dogs warily, though none even as much as smelled Kitty.

Eventually, Sasuke was told to stay put until a woman and a dog with an eye-patch picked him up. When she arrived, she just smirked down at him, and the dog leaked scary like a dam leaked water.

Sasuke gulped.

.

.

.

END PROLOUGE

2036


	2. Genin Exam Arc

The classroom was full of newly minted Genin excited for their team assignment, praying to god that their friends were on their teams.

Three of the new Genin stood out, in that they honestly didn't care who their teammates were. Two were friendless, unless you counted a cat and a fox puppet that had been given a sort-of life, and the third just didn't mind, because she was well-liked by most of the class and it didn't matter to her who her teammates were.

One was a blonde boy in a blinding orange jumpsuit. He was currently very annoyed that he had to put his Fox puppet away. If he could have Fox out, he wouldn't be so bored! But Iruka insisted that it 'was a distraction', even though the blonde didn't think so. The Inuzuka got to keep his ninken puppy in the classroom!

Another was a girl with pink hair with a green ribbon keeping it out of her eyes, while her headband was tied around her waist. She glared at the idiot fangirls that had surrounded the poor Uchiha boy. She thanked her 'older sister' Anko for breaking her of that so quickly.

The last was another boy, with a dark grey, scarred cat on the desk in front of him. He idly watched her get petted by his fangirls while waiting for Iruka to quiet the class and get the stupid fangirls off his back. Sure, he had a cat, but that didn't mean they had to crowd him! If only Kitty weren't such an _attention_ whore…

"Alright, settle down, guys. Team One…"

The three odd-Genin-out drifted away into their thoughts until their names were called.

"Team Seven, Naruto Uzumaki," the blonde perked up at the sound of his name, waiting eagerly to hear who his teammates were.

"…Sasuke Uchiha," the dark haired boy looked to the blonde boy and nodded. He knew Naruto was loud, but he also knew the other kid wasn't an idiot.

"And Sakura Haruno." The girl relaxed, knowing that she was put on a team with two of the less incompetent boys in the class.

"I'd suggest getting comfortable; your teacher might not be here for a while. Team Eight…"

The new Team Seven quietly traded seats with other Genin to sit next to each other.

Naruto was the one to suggest it. "Isn't Leaf known for its teamwork? Might as well get an early start, right?"

Sasuke snorted. "Why do you say that like you're not from here?"

Naruto shrugged. "I lived in Sand for a few years. It's where I learned Puppetry."

Sakura lit up. "Really? What's it like? How is their Ninja rankings set up? What's their economy like? What's-?"

"Hey, whoa. Relax. It's not that different from here. It's just sandier and there's a lot less Ramen."

Sakura deflated. "All of those research openings… wasted…"

Naruto laughed. "Sakura-chan, I was way too busy keeping Chiyo-sensei happy and working on Fox to research their economy and shit!"

Naruto ignored Sakura's pout and Sasuke's amused snort.

After a moment, it was just the three of them left in the classroom.

Suddenly, Sakura closed her eyes and smacked her forehead onto the desk in front of him. "Damn it, I just realized who our sensei is."

"How?" Sasuke asked his face remaining stoic.

Without looking up, Sakura answered. "I spent a lot of time in the Torture and Interrogation building with Anko-nii-chan. she works with Ibiki. Ibiki knows every ninja in the village and forced me to read up on the more infamous ones if I wanted to hang around. Like Kakashi."

Naruto whooped loudly. "Yeah! We got an infamous teacher!"

"You idiot, sit down. He's infamous for his lateness! He's never on time, not even for the Hokage!"

"How late are we talking?" Naruto asked after a minute of processing.

"Three hours, give or take."

Naruto tilted his head in thought. "So, he should be here… two-ish?"

Sakura looked at the clock. "That's if we're lucky."

Naruto sighed. "Well, at least I have time to do some maintenance on Fox…"

.

.

.

Four hours later their sensei arrived.

The door slid open, and the three of them paused in their various activities to look up.

Kakashi entered the room to see Naruto covered in grease elbows down, Sasuke stopped mid-move in a solitaire card game, and Sakura with a scroll in front of her and a highlighter in one hand.

"My first impression of you guys…" he trailed off. "I'm not sure. Let's move to the roof, hm?"

Naruto scrambled to pick up his supplies without getting Fox's fur or his jacket dirty, and Sasuke scowled at losing out on a game. Sakura only had to roll up her scroll and cap her highlighter.

Once on the roof, Naruto began cleaning himself off with a rag.

"How about we tell each other our names, likes, dislikes, goals and hobbies?" Kakashi said. "You first, grease monkey."

Naruto scowled at the nickname, but didn't argue.

"My name is Naruto Uzumaki. I like my puppets, ramen, my friend Kankuro, and my sensei Elder Chiyo. I dislike waiting," he paused, glaring pointedly at Kakashi, "the time it takes for instant ramen to cook, and rude people. My Goals are to become the best puppet master ever, and the Hokage! My hobbies are designing puppets, I guess."

Kakashi nodded. "You, Pinky."

Sakura sent the man a piercing glare. "My name's Sakura, and I really hate rude nicknames. I like Anko-nii-chan, genjutsu, books, scrolls, and researching. My goal is to be the best kunoichi ever, and my hobbies are reading and researching."

"And you, doom and gloom?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Sasuke Uchiha. I like Kitty, and training. I dislike fangirls and idiots. My ambition is to kill my brother, and I don't really have hobbies."

Kakashi nodded, but kept silent.

"…what about you, Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto asked.

"Me?" the older shinobi replied in surprise. "Well, my name is Kakashi Hatake, my likes and dislikes are none of your business, neither are my goals and hobbies."

Sakura snorted. "Kakashi Hatake. Jonin. Also known as Sharingan Kakashi or Copy-nin Kakashi. Is known to be hours late, and can usually be found at the memorial stone. Was the student of the Fourth Hokage, and got his Sharingan eye from a teammate who died in a cave in."

Kakashi looked at her in surprise.

"I've been training with the T&I since I was five. I picked some things up." Sasuke said, answering the Jonin's unasked question.

He cleared his throat. "Well, I suppose I should get on with it. You're not actually Genin yet." Kakashi's eye turned into an upside down U, like a smile. "The test you already took was to determine if you had the skill to become a Genin. The next test determines if you have the correct mindset to become a shinobi. But there's a catch."

The three children stayed silent and grit their teeth in anger.

"Generally, excluding the rare exception, only three teams in a graduating class pass."

Naruto sighed in relief. "Oh thank god. I already knew that."

Sasuke glared at the blonde, but stopped when Sakura agreed with him.

Kakashi deflated. "You three are no fun…"

Naruto scoffed. "I'm plenty of fun. I'm just not gonna let myself be bullied by you, even if you are a higher ranked shinobi."

The Jonin shrugged. "Well, I suppose all I can say now is meet me at training ground seven eight o'clock sharp, and don't eat breakfast."

Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto traded glanced after Kakashi had body-flickered away.

"Sakura, you seem well informed, anything on what his test might be?" Sasuke asked after a moment.

Sakura stared off into space for a second, thinking. "I remember hearing something about Kakashi being really big on teamwork. But if that's the case, then he's going to want to us to prove we can work together…"

"So he'll pit us against each other." Naruto finished.

Sakura and Sasuke gave him confused looks. "What?"

"If he wants us to prove we can really work together, then he's gonna pit us against each other. He's gonna make it to where only one of us can 'pass', but none of us will be able to get it without the others. Like, street rats stealing from a vendor. One will distract the guy, another will do the actual theft, and a third will play lookout. Does that make sense?"

"But he's a Jonin! Shouldn't he be able to beat us, even if it was three on one?" Sakura asked

Sasuke shook his head. "No, it's perfectly possible for three Genin to beat a Jonin. I've seen it done man times while I was… scouting other teams."

Sakura nodded. "So we HAVE to work together no matter what, right?"

"Right."

She sighed. "Well then, I guess we should make up some basic tactics. But first, what all can you guys do…"

.

.

.

The next morning, at nine o'clock, Team Seven met at the three logs in the ground at training ground seven.

"Mornin'…" Naruto yawned.

"Good morning."

"Hn."

Naruto snorted. "Don't be such a sourpuss, Sasuke."

Sakura choked on laughter. "Sourpuss…!"

Kitty purred loudly from Sasuke's arms, and he glared at all of them.

"I am not a sourpuss." He denied.

Sakura, still laughing behind her hand, disagreed. "Nope. Sasuke the Sourpuss. Hee!"

They wasted the time bickering, and Sasuke found it rather… liberating. He was so used to it being just him and Kitty, with minimal interaction between him and his 'tutor', Ibiki. He always thought that he would never need friends, that he would hardly need comrades, even. But arguing with his teammates, over something so stupid, was beginning to change his mind.

Kitty seemed to pick up on Sasuke's wavering, and decided to help her human out a little. It was about time he started having some fun.

Naruto was rather surprise when the scarred cat jumped at him, and he only just barely managed to catch her. After the initial shock wore off, he grinned.

"See? Even your cat agrees with me!"

A familiar voice interrupted before Sasuke could argue.

"I'm glad to see my cute little Genin getting along!"

The three spun around to see Kakashi perched on one of the logs, reading an orange book that had a red circle with a slash through it.

"You're late." Naruto growled.

"Sorry. I got lost on the road of life." Kakashi apologized insincerely, "but let's not worry about that. Your goal is to get one of these from me…."

He held up two bells, and continued, "By noon. You may begin when I say 'go'."

"But, Kakashi-sensei, there's only two bells." Sakura pointed out.

He did that weird eye-smile thing again. "That reminds me. I forgot to mention, anyone who fails gets sent back to the academy!"

That brought out angered reactions from all three, Naruto being the loudest.

"No arguing! On my mark; three… two…. One, go!"

In a flash, Sasuke and Sakura vanished into the trees, while Naruto stood defiantly in the same spot he had been before.

Kakashi waited twenty minutes before saying anything.

"You're not even going to try to hide?" Kakashi asked with a tilt of his head. "How foolish."

Naruto just grinned. "I don't need to hide!"

He reached into his bag at his side and produced two scrolls. Each had a single word written on them. Naruto chomped down on the one labeled "Fox", and swept the other open in an overly dramatic way, grinning around the other, labeled "Angel".

"Shummonif Techniquf: Sheshy Kunocshi!"

While Kakashi was trying to figure out what Naruto had been trying to say, a figure appeared in a poof of smoke, and Kakashi couldn't help but freeze even momentarily.

It was a woman. An extremely beautiful woman, with cascading, curly red hair, and bright red eyes. And she wasn't exactly wearing… modest clothes. She wore what could _barely_ be called a kimono; it was black and grey, and had a gap that went up to her hip on both sides, along with a mesh bodysuit, knee-high ninja boots, and little else. Kakashi was also caught off guard because the woman seemed to be from Leaf, as she had a headband red cloth with Konoha's symbol.

While Kakashi was still star struck, Sakura began part two of the plan Team Seven had made the day before.

"Illusion: Angel's Love!" she whispered. Angel's Love wasn't a very strong genjutsu and it took about ten minutes to set in, but combined with Naruto's (_stupid, horrible, irritating, sexist_) puppet, Angel, it would be enough to fool the older Jonin while Sasuke and Kitty got the bells. She thanked Anko for blackmailing her friend Kurenai into teaching her it.

Kakashi didn't even notice Kitty snatching the bells off of his belt.

Naruto waited until Sasuke gave him a thumbs up to put Angel back into her scroll, and both scrolls in their place in his bag. Sakura let go of the genjutsu, but didn't dispel it, when Naruto sealed her back up. Sasuke and Sakura returned to Naruto's side just as Kakashi snapped out of it.

"Nice try, Naruto, but you won't beat me that easily…." Kakashi trailed off when he saw Sasuke holding up two bells in front of him.

"We win, Kakashi-sensei." He stated simply.

Kakashi checked his side, and found no bells. He looked back up to them, surprised.

"We decided a quick approach would be best, Kakashi-sensei." Sakura explained. "Naruto would distract you while I dropped a genjutsu on you, and then Sasuke would get the bells. It worked a lot better than we expected though. I certainly didn't know you were such a pervert!"

Kakashi stared at them a moment longer before speaking. "I- You- you pass."

Naruto whooped loudly and high-fived Sakura. Sasuke rejected his high five, but he did smile triumphantly.

"Woo! Victory lunch! Ichiraku here we come!"

Sakura and Sasuke followed Naruto while he babbled on about the ramen stand and how much he missed it in the five years he had been in Sand, but if they ever went there, he knew this awesome little dango shop…

Kakashi let out a huge breath. "I don't think I can train these three properly."

.

.

.

The Hokage looked at the Jonin surrounding him.

"Is Kakashi here yet?"

"No, Hokage-sama."

He sighed. "Well, let's move on without him for now. Who passed their teams?"

"Team Eight passed."

"Team Ten passed."

The door opened.

"Sorry I'm late, I…." he trailed off. "I can't think of an excuse. I apologize, Hokage-sama."

The Hokage eyed the Jonin warily. "Are you alright, Kakashi-san?"

"Ye-" he shook his head. "No. my team passed."

All the Jonin turned to look at him now.

"Team Seven passed."

The Hokage leaned back and took a puff from his pipe. "I see. I assume that it was only just barely a pass?"

"No, they passed with flying colors. Took less than an hour to get the bells. I'm blaming Ibiki."

The Hokage smiled. "I can't wait to see them after you've trained them up a bit, Kakashi-san. The rest of you are dismissed, I want to talk to you alone for a moment, Kakashi-san."

Kakashi waited while the other Jonin shuffled out quietly.

"You seem concerned, Kakashi-san. Is it about your team?" the Hokage asked.

Kakashi nodded. "Yes. I'm not sure I can train them properly. I was prepared for a blitzkrieg team, and they're more of a capture-retrieval team. I don't know much about training a CR team at all, Hokage-sama."

"Hmm."

"I don't want to step down as their teacher, however. I was hoping you might let me borrow one of the ANBU captains who specialize in CR."

The Hokage looked at Kakashi in surprise. "ANBU, Kakashi-san? Are you certain?"

Kakashi scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I know most of the ANBU; I was an ANBU Captain for years. I know that Cat, well, red-mask Cat likes Naruto well enough, and Wolf doesn't care about it, and they're both excellent CR team leaders."

"… You make an excellent point, Kakashi-san. If they agree, then I will give them permission to teach."

Kakashi bowed in thanks. A rare sight, the Hokage noted, for anyone. "Thank you, Hokage-sama."

"Dismissed."

.

.

.

"Naruto, you know how this goes." Sakura sighed.

"But that monster's gonna tear up poor Foxy-chan! Do you know how expensive faux fur is!?"

"I refuse to lose any more blood to that beast!" she said, glaring. "And why don't you use Angel? It won't tear _her_ up!"

During the two months they had been a team, Sakura and Sasuke got very used to both of Naruto's puppets, and were starting to get use to him doodling in a notebook mid-fight. Sakura still didn't like Angel, but understood her use. She was also pleased to learn that she was not anatomically correct. Sasuke was only mildly annoyed when Naruto made him slow down a move so he could see it better, and it wouldn't bother him so much if he would give a less cryptic answer than "I'm making a puppet!" when asked.

"I hadn't thought of that. And hey! I think she's got some paralytic poison on some senbon in her arm. It should be just enough to down the stupid thing if we can catch it…"

"Mrrr." Kitty growled through a mouthful of fur.

"Never mind. Kitty took care of it." Sasuke interrupted while Naruto was scrawling in his notebook frantically. "Thanks, Kitty."

Sasuke grabbed his teammate's sleeve to guide him. Naruto had run into more than one pole while scribbling in his notebook and walking at the same time. While it had been a little funny the first few times, it started to get annoying. So he and Sakura took turns guiding him.

"I still can't believe you named your cat Kitty." Naruto mumbled.

Sasuke glared. "I was five, moron. And you're worse than I am in any case."

Sakura tuned them out, holding Kitty while Sasuke callously gripped Tora's scruff. Kakashi stopped them long enough to confirm that it was Tora before letting them walk back to the Hokage Tower to turn the mission in for the _twentieth time that month._

"I swear to god, if we have to catch this cat again, I'm snapping its neck." Sakura said cheerfully.

Sasuke and Kitty both gave her horrified looks, and both distanced themselves from her. Sasuke shoved Naruto between him and her, and Kitty jumped from her arms into Naruto's.

Naruto was getting used to having a face-full of cat at inopportune moments, and was also getting used to catching her when she jumped to him. It was very weird, because he was used to animals staying the fuck away from him whenever possible.

"Now, now, Sakura. If you three are getting that bored with D-Ranks, I suppose we could ask for a C-rank." Kakashi said to pacify them, as he had yet to actually find Wolf or red-mask Cat. The other ANBU told him they were on separate missions and weren't going to be back until a month or so before the next Chunin exams.

Naruto looked up, wide-eyed in excitement. "Really!?"

Kakashi nodded, even as he knew he was going to regret it. No matter what it was, a ninja's first C-rank always went bad. _Always_.

.

.

.

END CHAPTER ONE

2036


	3. Wave Arc

"Hokage-sama, my team is ready for a C-Rank."

The Hokage looked up from the scrolls in front of him in surprise. "Are you sure, Kakashi-san?"

Kakashi nodded. "Yes."

"Yeah, we're tough! We can do this!" Naruto shouted while doing a stupid little dance.

Sasuke sighed, and shoved the physically weaker boy down. "Sit. Be calm."

Naruto pouted. '_Damn you Kankuro, for telling me I didn't need strength training!'_

The Hokage looked to the other two members of Team Seven. "Do you two believe you're ready for a C-Rank?"

Sasuke nodded. "Yes, Hokage-sama."

Sakura wavered a moment.

'_Don't you dare say no, Sakura! If you do I swear to god I will-!' _Inner Sakura shouted. Sakura tuned out her Inner Self's threats and stood up straighter. Not to mention is Anko got wind of her turning a mission down, she'd never hear the end of it.

"Yes, Hokage-sama."

"Hokage-sama! They've barely been Genin for two months! They're not ready for a C-rank! You know that all-!"

"Yes, Iruka-san, but I have a feeling these three will be just fine. And I have just the mission for you three. Please send Tazuna-san in."

A man stumbled in. he was drunk, and had a rope tied around his forehead. He looked at the Genin of Team Seven. "These are the ninja you're sending to protect me? They're a bunch of brats! And that blonde one, he looks particularly stupid!"

"WHY YOU-!"

Sasuke quickly caught the back of Naruto's orange jacket to stop his attack.

"Sit." He ordered, glaring at the blonde.

He turned to Tazuna.

"I'm afraid that you are incorrect. Naruto is very intelligent. You would be wise to watch your mouth." He warned.

Kakashi laughed nervously. "Okay, you three, meet me at the East Gate in an hour. Pack for a long trip."

As they were walking out of the Tower, Sasuke grabbed the collar of Naruto's jacket.

"Naruto, you need to learn some self-control." Sasuke growled, dragging him away from the client and their teacher.

"Hey, hey, watch the jacket! I get it, I flew off the handle, I learned my lesson, you can let me go now!"

Sasuke released his jacket. "Pack for two weeks. And I'd suggest bringing something to work on, like that secret project you won't talk about."

Naruto shrugged and shifted his jacket until it was lying comfortably again. "Yeah, sure. He's almost done anyway. Just have to do some finishing and aesthetics."

"Wave is on a bunch of islands." Sakura added. "If I were you two, I'd bring some waterproof clothes. And Naruto, for the love of god, get rid of that horrible orange outfit."

"But I _like_ orange!" Naruto fired off before bolting away to his apartment.

Sakura growled in frustration. "I might be late, not that it matters, but I have to tell both my parents and Kurenai-sensei that I'm going to be gone a while."

"Late is relative with Kakashi-sensei." Sasuke agreed.

.

.

.

The three gathered at the Gate an hour and a half later.

"You three are late!" Tazuna shouted, pointing at them. "And where's that teacher of yours? He ditched me halfway here."

Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto laughed at him.

"Be prepared for another hour's wait, Tazuna-san. Kakashi-sensei's always late." Sakura said condescendingly.

Naruto rolled his shoulders and sat down on a patch of concrete. "Yep. Get comfy."

A little under an hour later, Kakashi arrived.

"I thought your students were late, but you're really late!"

Kakashi smiled. "Sorry, I had to run an errand, but I had to take another route to avoid walking under a ladder, and then I got lost."

Stunned, Tazuna shut up.

"Naruto, where's your bag?"

Naruto gave Kakashi a look that suggested he thought the older ninja was an idiot. "Bag? Psh. Who needs a bag when you've got sealing scrolls?"

"What if it gets wet? You won't be able to get to it then." Kakashi argued.

"Water proof paper and ink."

"And if it's torn? Then it's lost forever."

"You obviously don't know how storage seals work." Naruto said flatly. "Every storage seal is unique. If you know what it looks like, you can recreate it on any surface and get the things sealed inside of it. That's why I'm not worried."

Kakashi shrugged. "If you say so. Let's get moving, my cute little Genin!"

.

.

.

After recovering from the shock of the Demon Brothers' attack, and Kakashi's sudden Dead-Not-Dead routine, they began to realize that this mission wasn't exactly what they thought it was going to be, especially Sakura, who knew the rules for labeling ranks to missions.

"Good job on keeping your cool, Sasuke. And good job on following orders, Sakura, Naruto."

Sakura frowned. "This isn't a C-rank."

"You're right. It's a B-Rank, and it could go to A-Rank if we encounter a Jonin opponent. I wonder why you lied to us, Tazuna-san?" Kakashi asked cheerfully. "Didn't you know that lying in a mission statement is a punishable offense?"

Tazuna shank under Sasuke's glare.

"Wave is poor!" he explained, his voice catching a hysterical tone. "We hardly have enough money to feed ourselves! It took us three months to get enough money for this C-rank! If we had waited any longer, there wouldn't be a bridge to protect, or a bridge builder to finish it!"

"Tazuna-san, we are Genin." Sakura said slowly. "We can't beat a Jonin level opponent if he'd go all out! Which he or she will, if they encounter us! We have to go back to Konoha, and you can request a different team, or raise the rank."

The bridge builder sighed, and tried a different tactic. "I guess I can't blame you if you leave me here. If I die, by cute grandson will cry for a week, and my daughter will hate Konoha shinobi for the rest of her life, if Gatou lets them live."

"We can beat a Jonin." Naruto argued. "Remember the bell test? We just gotta work together. I say we continue."

"I agree."

Out voted by her teammates, she turned to Kakashi. "Kakashi-sensei…?"

He shrugged. "Sasuke and Naruto are right."

Then he smiled. "And you have me, so no worries!"

Suddenly, Sasuke stiffened. "What was that about Gatou?"

Tazuna, hopeful, began explaining. "Gatou, of Gatou's shipping company, has Wave in a stranglehold. We're starving to death. But if this bridge gets built, we won't need his ships, and Wave can start to recover. But Gatou's put a price on my head for starting the bridge."

"Doesn't Wave have a Shinobi force?" Naruto asked, scratching his head.

Tazuna shook his head. "No. we don't."

Naruto was horrified. "Aren't you allied with a country that does?"

"No." Tazuna answered.

Naruto's blue eyes turned steely. "Well that decides it. We're continuing this mission."

Sakura sighed and gave in. she learned her lesson regarding Naruto's stubbornness the one and last time she tried to convince him to change out of his stupid orange outfit…

"_Naruto, no self-respecting shinobi would wear that- that- that Kill-Me- Orange that your stupid outfit is made of!" she shouted at him._

"_Hey! I respect myself!"_

"_You're going to get us all killed if you wear that on a dangerous mission!"_

_Sasuke tried to stem their arguing. "Sakura, please calm down."_

"_I wear this JUST SO you two won't get killed on a dangerous mission! Who are the enemies gonna go after, the girl, an Uchiha, or an obnoxious loudmouth blonde in a Kill-Me-Orange suit, huh? ME! Which is exactly what YOU want! Remember what Kakashi-sensei said- we're a Capture Retrieval team! And all of our tactics need for you and Sasuke to not be seen! What better way to keep eyes off you than to keep them on me? So just STOP, Sakura-chan!"_

Sakura was startled from the memory when she heard Naruto yelp and Sasuke reprimanding Kitty.

"Kitty, it's just a rabbit." Sasuke said, enduring scratches and bites while she spit and hiss at the rabbit from his arms. "Stop that!"

Kakashi noticed the slight mist swirling around their feet getting thicker and higher. It made him wary, but he waited until the hair on the back of neck rose and instinct told him to avoid something coming straight for his neck.

"DUCK!"

All three hit the ground. Sasuke, luckily, had the foresight to grab Tazuna's collar and drag him down with them. He was also careful to not smash Kitty underneath him. Naruto was thankful he hadn't had Fox out; otherwise she'd have been cleaved in half by that _big fucking sword_. Sakura watched a few pink strands of hair that hadn't escaped the attack in horror.

A low voice echoed through the trees. "Hand over the bridge builder and nobody gets hurt."

"Stay back!" Kakashi ordered frantically, though he tried not to show how scared he was for his team, "this is-!"

Sakura cut him off. "Zabuza Momochi, ex-Mist. Ex- ANBU, is part of the seven swordsmen and still carries his blade, even after fleeing from Mist. Also known as Demon of the Hidden Mist. Has a standing Do Not Engage order for any shinobi under Special Jonin rank."

"Your student is very knowledgeable, Jonin. Perhaps I should kill her just for being insufferable?"

Kakashi ignored the missing nin. "Stay calm and protect Tazuna! I'll handle Zabuza!"

The voice chuckled. "oh wonderful! I was hoping you would say that! I've been itching for a bloodbath!"

Kakashi ran into the mist, his figure disappearing more and more the further in he went.

"Naruto. Sakura." Sasuke whispered.

"yeah?"

"What, Sasuke?"

Instead of verbally replying, he used shinobi sign language. _'Can you understand me?'_

Thankfully, they both replied in kind, though Naruto had a very weird accent to his and it was slightly unintelligible.

'_Yes. Sort of. Your accent is chocolate, though.'_

Sakura looked at Sasuke in confusion. _'Chocolate?'_

'_Shit, I'm still barked to Sand hand signs. I meant horrible.'_

'_Used to?'_

'_DAMN IT. Yes!'_

Sasuke made a mental note to tell Kakashi-sensei about that little issue, but ignored it otherwise. '_We're going to have to help scarecrow-sensei if he gets into trouble. Do you think we can take sword-guy?'_

Signing could get a little confusing, there being a distinct lack of ways to say a name other than spelling it out and the dialects that exist even within Konoha (Naruto was a mixed bag of Sasuke signed in the Uchiha dialect, and Sakura used a lot of the T&I signs instead of the standard Academy signs that would be expected of a civilian born shinobi) being the two biggest issues.

'_Maybe? If we surprise him, I would dance.'_

'_Dance?'_

Naruto growled. '_Think. Damn it.'_

Sasuke stifled a groan of annoyance. '_We'll work on this. Okay, so here's the plan if Scarecrow-sensei is incapacitated…'_

After a few more misunderstandings between the three of them (Sakura proposed that they sign instead of talk for a while just to get used to each other's dialects, both boys agreed), they had a plan, and a backup plan. Unluckily, they ended up needing that plan. Luckily, Zabuza made it even easier than they were expecting it to be.

The mist cleared, and the three Genin tensed.

Zabuza stood on a pond, his chest puffed up a little, like he was a smug little Academy Student who managed to pin down their sensei for the first time. It succeeded in unnerving Team Seven. However, that wasn't what they were mostly worried about.

"Kakashi-sensei!"

Kakashi was trapped in a sphere of water. Sakura recognized it as the Water Prison Technique that one of the ANBU used because (s)he (Sakura was rarely certain on gender of ANBU- they only ever used hand signs, and most were gender-ambiguous enough that she just couldn't tell) had a lot of chakra, and their chakra element was water.

"Guys, we have to get Kakashi-sensei out of there," Sakura warned. "Before this guy decides to drown him!"

Naruto tossed her a thumbs-up and ignored Kakashi's desperate shouts for them to run back to Konoha. "Don't worry Sakura-chan, we've got this handled!"

Sasuke handed Sakura Kitty. "Watch her, Sakura."

She nodded, and waited for the boys to get Zabuza's attention before placing a very subtle genjutsu on the Jonin that slightly altered his perceptions- instead of slicing someone's neck, he'd be skimming their hair. Sakura could only hope the boys would keep him busy enough to not notice it.

"Hey! Eyebrowless freak!" Naruto shouted, taking Fox's scroll from his side bag, "why don't you go buggar off, huh!?"

Zabuza laughed. "Look at you kid-!"

'_Yes, please look at Naruto, not Sasuke sneaking around behind you to throw a kunai at your arm so you'll let go of Kakashi-sensei!'_ Sakura thought furiously.

"-you don't even register on my radar! Tell you what, make it into the bingo books, and maybe I'll consider fighting you!" he finished with a scathing laugh.

"Well it's my lucky day, isn't it?" Naruto shouted, grinning with a mad glint in his eye that Sakura occasionally saw in Anko's eye when she was feeling particularly vindictive or unhinged. "If you've got an Iwagakure Bingo Book, I'll even let you look me up! Naruto Uzumaki, freak!"

If it wouldn't have ruined their appearance of cohesiveness, Sakura could have _strangled_ Naruto for boasting falsely.

Zabuza, however, seemed curious enough that he actually reached into his pocket with his free hand and pulled out an actual Iwagakure Bingo book and flipped through it. Sakura wondered if he bought it off the black market like Anko had to get hers.

"Well, kid," Zabuza said after a moment, breaking the silence, "it looks like it is your lucky day, brat. I always did want to see a Puppeteer in action. I suppose a little Genin brat like you will do."

Oh. Maybe she wouldn't have to strangle Naruto later.

Kakashi started struggling inside of his prison. It would do him no good, just shorten his oxygen supply, Sakura knew. "Naruto, no! He'll tear you to shreds! Just go!"

Naruto took a moment to deal with their so-as-I-say-not-as-I-do sensei. "Screw you Kakashi-sensei! Who was it that said 'those who don't obey the rules are trash, but those who abandon their teammates are worse than trash' again? So shut up and let me rescue you!"

Naruto ignored any further protests from Kakashi, and summoned Fox from her scroll. Motionless except for twitching fingers, Naruto directed Fox to leap at Zabuza, and Sakura saw her chance to lay the Genjutsu.

And just in time, too. Naruto would have been hysterical if that swing had sliced Fox's head off. As it was, her ear went flying, and Naruto let out a strangled sound while using a separate finger to reel it in before it fell into the chakra-charged water.

"You're gonna pay for that, you bastard!"

Sasuke, however, cut him short, with a Fuuma shuriken that flew directly for Zabuza's wrist, and would have took it clean off if he hadn't moved.

"You little-!"

"DAMN IT SASUKE! WHAT'D YOU DO THAT FOR!?"

"You took too long, Naruto."

"I was _just getting started_, you asshole!" Naruto protested, having Fox avoid Zabuza's every attack while glaring at Sasuke.

Sasuke shrugged and disappeared back into the tree line, reappearing a moment later by Sakura's side again. Sakura mutely handed Kitty back to him, and he took the cat gently.

Zabuza lost interest in Fox and turned back to fighting Kakashi when the Jonin started attacking him again. "You're lucky I let you go, otherwise your stupid brats would be out a teacher, and maybe even dead themselves!"

"Wrong." Kakashi countered. "You never let me go. My Genin forced you to let go, or didn't you notice Sakura's genjutsu?"

At the mention (which Sakura would remember to chew Kakashi out about later- how dare he reveal her secrets!?) of it, Zabuza noticed that his aim was horribly off, and started to compensate. Kakashi dodged one last swing when Zabuza seized up and started falling.

A blur shot out of the trees from behind them, and caught the missing nin.

The blur landed on some (rather muddy, from the big water battle Kakashi and Zabuza had before Kakashi got caught) grass. Once it stopped, the blur was revealed to be a teenager with a white hunter-nin mask, and Zabuza was seen with a pair of senbon stuck in his neck.

That thought itched at the back of Sakura's mind as being weird, but she put it off for the moment.

"Thank you for weakening him, ninja-san," The blur said with a polite bow. "I have been hunting Zabuza for some time, but he has proven elusive."

Kakashi smiled in return. "You're welcome, Hunter-san."

Without any other words, the hunter-nin shot off with Zabuza over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

Kakashi turned his head sluggishly to look at the three Genin.

"Well. If you don't mind, could one of you catch me?" he asked, and began sinking a moment later.

Naruto directed Fox to dart underneath him so that he would be sitting on the giant fox's back, and Kakashi used the last of his strength to latch onto the faux (oh how Naruto loved to play with that pun…) fur before passing out.

Sasuke took command of the situation then, "Tazuna-san, please lead the way to you home. Kakashi-sensei has chakra exhaustion and needs rest."

Tazuna nodded obediently and led the way. There were few things more terrifying than witnessing a shinobi battle, and even fewer things less terrifying than a shinobi battle between high-level ninja, like Kakashi and Zabuza were.

.

.

.

"Oh dear."

If there was ever a phrase Sasuke did not want to hear at that moment, it would be "oh dear", "oops", or "I've made a mistake".

"I think I made a mistake. Oops."

And unfortunately for him, he was just subjected to all three.

Sakura groaned, and Sasuke noticed that even Naruto looked wary, and the blonde was typically very… oblivious. And loud. But mostly oblivious. Kitty head-butted his hand in worry, and Sasuke smoothed back her ears gently to comfort her.

"It seems that Zabuza is not, in fact, dead." Kakashi declared.

Sakura slapped her forehead loudly. "Senbon!"

"Exactly." Kakashi confirmed pleasantly.

Naruto expressed the confusion Sasuke was reluctant to show. "Wait, what?"

"Senbon, Naruto." Sakura said, emphasizing 'senbon' significantly. "They're not typically weapons; they're more often used as medical tools because they're a pain in the ass to aim. Okay, yeah, I know you use them in launchers, but most shinobi avoid them because it's difficult to make a kill like that hunter-nin did, and besides, he went totally against the number two rule in the book: kill the body at the site of death!"

"Why is that number two?" Sasuke asked curiously.

Sakura spared him a glance. "Number one is 'don't die, the mission can always be reissued.' It's much harder to make ANBU than any other rank, you know. Most of them go crazy before they quit or are forced out."

"I see. So Zabuza is alive and he has an accomplice?" Sasuke asked, keeping calm the way his nin'neko teacher taught him to.

"Yep! Which means, you three are going to be training! Tell me, do you know how to tree walk?"

All three nodded. Kakashi seemed surprised. Most Academy Students didn't learn that skill until they became Genin. "Who taught you?"

Sakura looked at him like he was stupid. "Anko-nii-chan."

Naruto shrugged. "Some ANBU who was walking me to Suna."

Sasuke was reluctant, but he did give an answer. "Aiko-sensei."

Sasuke watched his teacher's eye while he thought. Obviously the Jonin was trying to come up with something that would be useful to them, and after a moment, and the sight of Naruto's impatient grumbles, Sasuke tried to prod Kakashi along. He hated it when Naruto started ranting, it always got annoying, very quickly.

"What about that water walking thing you and Zabuza did yesterday?"

Kakashi looked at him in appreciation. It seemed that he noticed Naruto's impatience too.

"Naruto, do you know water walking?" Kakashi asked.

"Yeah. I know pretty much any chakra exercise you can think of." The blonde grumbled. "How about I teach Sasuke and Sakura water walking while you take a goddamn nap like you're supposed to, and then I work on Blade while you're sleeping?"

Kakashi didn't seem to like that idea too terribly much, but he didn't argue, as it was the best one anyone had come up with yet.

"Alright." Kakashi agreed reluctantly, "but as soon as I can walk without falling over, I want to test for your chakra element. Might as well give you something to use in case your puppets are rendered unusable. As a last resort, of course."

Sasuke remembered the one and only time anyone had insinuated that his puppets (not dolls; that was a whole other can of worms that Sasuke had _not_ wanted to see opened) could be broken. So now, the rest of Team Seven, and Team Eight (it was Kiba who had said it, the idiot) were very careful to say 'unusable', not 'broken'.

Naruto, thankfully, didn't kick up a fuss.

After a moment of waiting for Kakashi to say something else, Naruto stood. "Alright, guys. Let's go to that pond we passed on the way in. I hope you can swim, because when you fall in, I'm not gonna rescue you."

"I don't know why you're trying. You'll never beat Gatou." A child's voice said from the doorway. "You're all gonna die."

Sasuke watched in mild shock as Naruto completely ignored the kid, and brushed past him like he didn't exist. Sakura was in a similar state of mild shock, but recovered enough to glare at the kid when she followed after Naruto.

"You better stop them," the kid warned. "Or they're gonna get themselves killed."

Sasuke snorted. "Kid, we're ninja. Naruto grew up in the Sand Village for most of his life, Sakura lurked around the Torture and Interrogation HQ for years, and I've got bigger fish to fry than a civvie businessman, kid. Our teacher, him, right there? He's more dangerous than us three combined, multiplied by two. If you really want us to stop, you'll have to get your granddad to cancel our contract, because we aren't going home until that bridge is built."

And with that, Sasuke fell into step behind Naruto and Sakura, who had slowed long enough to listen to their teammate, who had actually said more than a single sentence or monosyllabic grunt to someone who he had never met before.

.

.

.

Team Seven fell into a routine for a few days.

They would wake, and eat a really early breakfast-type snack. Once all three of them were finished, they'd head out to their makeshift training grounds, where Sasuke would try to figure out how to walk on water and Sakura would do katas to get her reserves up like Anko was always pestering her to do.

Naruto, meanwhile, would sit on a blanket that he produced from one of the many scrolls in his side bag, and tinker with a very simple-looking puppet. (The blanket was so he wouldn't get mud on his puppet or the seat of his pants.)

After about an hour, at which point Tazuna was waking up, they'd return for actual breakfast, and one of the three of them would escort Tazuna to the bridge while the other two would take turns taking care of Kakashi and training.

When Kakashi recovered enough that Naruto would permit him to do jutsus, he started teaching Naruto some elemental jutsus (wind, interestingly enough. Kakashi made a mental note to bribe Azuma into letting him copy some wind jutsus for the kid).

And finally, _finally_, the day came when Zabuza made his move.

Kakashi had had a bad feeling that morning, and made all three of Team Seven go to the bridge, while he left a Shadow Clone behind at Tazuna's home to protect Inari and Tsunami, just in case. Team Seven grumbled a little about missing out on training, but didn't argue, because they could feel the pressure in the air too, especially Sasuke, who recognized it from That Day.

When they arrived at the bridge, the bridge workers were knocked out, and scattered around the bridge. Mist was swirling around their feet, and started to thicken upon their arrival.

Naruto wasted no time in getting Fox out, took Kitty from Sasuke, and put her inside his jacket, like they had practiced. Since Naruto stayed back while Sasuke got in close, Sasuke decided it was better to leave Kitty with Naruto, and Naruto needed his hands available, so he put her in his coat like he had seen Kiba do with Akamaru.

"Been a little while, Kakashi. I see you've still got those annoying brats with you." Zabuza's voice boomed though the fog. "And it looks like you've trained them up a bit. But are they going to be worthy opponents?"

The mist cleared a little, and they could see Zabuza. Next to him was the Hunter-nin that had taken his body away.

"Looks like I was right, my cute little Genin." Kakashi said, with a false smile in his voice. "The Hunter-nin was on Zabuza's side."

"He's mine." Sasuke said shortly. "Since Naruto stole the fight last time."

In an instant, Naruto began protesting. "Jackass, you stole my fight! Don't even-!"

"Naruto, not now!" Sakura hissed.

Zabuza laughed. "Maybe not. Haku, go ahead and take out the sneaky one. We don't need him pulling that same bullshit tactic he did the first time."

"Yes sir, Zabuza-sama."

Kakashi, with a false smile still in his voice, approved of the match up. "Go on, Sasuke."

Naruto watched Sasuke and the Fake Hunter-nin leap at each other, impatiently waiting for a signal for assistance from Sasuke. Until his teammate either asked, or was on the verge of being killed, he wasn't going to step in, because he knew Sasuke would hate that and be pissy for weeks if he interrupted.

"Naruto, Sakura. Protect Tazuna, and get the civvies out of here."

"Yes, sensei!"

Naruto kept one eye on Sasuke's fight while he sent Fox out to drag the civilians out of the line of fire (after switching Fox's teeth for the set that didn't have a deadly poison or paralytic agent coated on them, as the three sets of teeth were all stored inside Fox's skull, because he made it easy to switch between the three on Sakura's suggestion, which he admitted was pretty brilliant).

Zabuza laughed again. "Come on, Kakashi. Let's have a rematch, eh?"

Kakashi looked to his two students, who both nodded.

"We'll be fine, Kakashi-sensei." Sakura assured him.

"Yeah. We'll keep an eye on Sasuke and the civvies!" Naruto agreed readily.

With a nod, Kakashi vanished, and reappeared in front of Zabuza, and they began trading blows.

Naruto was more concerned with Sasuke. He looked like he was doing okay, but he whistled to get his attention anyway, "you need any help, bastard!?"

"Actually, it might be-!" Sasuke panted, "Appreciated if you could give this asshole a nice bite from Fox!"

Naruto grinned. It seemed the loner bastard was finally starting to see the value in asking for help! But Naruto wasn't going to ruin that by taunting him, and merely barked out "on it!" before switching Fox's teeth for the paralyzing set. He sent Fox to dash in and bite the Fake Hunter-nin when Sasuke managed to pin the boy (girl?) for a moment.

Sasuke shot Naruto a grateful nod when the Fake Hunter-nin started slowing.

"What have you done to me?" the fake hunter-nin shouted at Naruto sluggishly.

Naruto grinned (insanely, Sakura would later argue, to which he would only offer a token protest- he knew Puppeteers weren't exactly known for their sanity) and answered truthfully;

"I poisoned you!"

Sasuke was close enough to hear his opponent grind his teeth.

"I suppose I have no choice then. I had hoped that I could incapacitate you without using this but… Hidden Technique: Crystal Ice Mirrors!"

The puddles surrounding them, along with some of the mist, began rising and forming solid, floating rectangles of ice that, amazingly, acted like mirrors. The Fake Hunter-nin was still on the outside, while Sasuke was dead center.

Naruto began to grow a little worried, and saw that Kakashi seemed mildly worried as well.

"You don't happen to still have that flamethrower, do you, Naruto?" Sakura asked quietly. "If you do, do you think you could melt those ice mirror things?"

Naruto could have slapped himself. Why hadn't he thought of that earlier?

Fox's jaw opened unnaturally, and a gunmetal grey tube slid out slowly. It sputtered a little before letting out a lick of flame. Fox's head tilted to get a perfect angle at the 'ice mirror things' as Sakura had so eloquently put it, and let out a blast of fire so hot it was beginning to become white and yellow instead of yellow and red.

After a solid minute, and half a gallon of the flammable concoction of oils and lighter fluid Naruto had made specifically for heat later, he ice mirrors were only a little drippy.

"Okay, that's not cool." Naruto complained. "That's hot enough to melt friggin' metal. There's no reason that ice should have survived that!"

Sakura bit her lip. "I think I might be able to drop something on the Hunter- nin but- _What on earth…?"_

Naruto looked in the same direction Sakura was staring, and let out a hysterical bark of laughter. "Well that's not something you see every day."

The Fake Hunter-nin was half in and half out of the mirror. His head and torso were leaning out, but his lower body was actually in the mirror, much to Team Seven's shared surprise. Naruto and Sakura couldn't hear him, but he seemed to be talking to Sasuke.

Sasuke, however, could hear the Fake Hunter-nin and was listening intently.

"do you have a precious person, someone you'd do anything to protect?" the Fake Hunter-nin- Haku- asked him, in a gentle voice that had no business in a ninja battle. "Or do you live for another goal, like revenge or knowledge?"

Sasuke hesitated, though he didn't let his guard down. His first thought was to say, 'revenge', but his love for Kitty, and his recent (and surprising) camaraderie with his fellow members of Team Seven convinced him to answer differently, "…I have recently come to care about my team, but I also want revenge on a certain someone."

Haku nodded, not surprised. "Zabuza-sama is my precious person, and I will do everything in my power to help him achieve his goals. Even if it means becoming his tool."

Sasuke scowled. "I'll help my teammates each their goals if they help me reach mine. That's how teamwork works. Not one becoming a tool for another."aku

Haku shook his head. "Maybe for you, but not for me. If Zabuza hadn't taken me in as his tool, I would have died, starving on the streets, or lynched for my bloodline limit."

"You're an idiot." Sasuke said coldly. "Naruto had a similar past, from what I understand, and he fought _through_ it. He became a ninja because he wanted recognition for something he did, he wanted friends, and he fought for that. Never once, in the entire time I have known him, have I ever seen him be anything other than happy.

"And I've known him for quite a few years- we went to the academy together." He added. "Obviously our village hates him for something, but nobody will tell Sakura or I. but never have I ever seen Naruto upset about it. Not once."

Kakashi heard Sasuke's angry (if one knew how to hear emotions from cold people, which he did) rant, and was surprised. He hadn't realized that Sasuke had noticed the glares the villagers gave Naruto, and if Kakashi understood fully, Sakura had also noticed. He made a mental note to ask the Hokage if his students could get the Secret spilled to them, as Naruto was their teammate, and he was affected by it immensely.

"Kakashi! Pay attention!" Zabuza snapped. "Quit worrying about your student, I'm sure Haku will kill him kindly. Hell, the kid might not even kill your brat. Fight me!"

"As you wish, Zabuza."

Naruto worriedly watched Sasuke and Haku talk, and hoped he'd be able to step in if he had to. He could feel Kitty lashing her tail nervously inside his hoodie, though she couldn't really move her tail much. She was just as worried about Sasuke as he was.

Sakura picked up the sounds of a commotion from the other end of the bridge, where it met the land in Wave. She turned to look, and tugged on Naruto's sleeve when she processed what she was seeing.

"Oh, shit." Naruto breathed.

Gatou was at the head of an army of mercenaries and missing-nin from various villages, though he couldn't recognize any of them.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura shouted. "We've got major incoming!"

Zabuza was the next to comment. "Gatou? I thought I told you I could handle these Leaf-nin!"

Gatou laughed. "Well, I was hoping that either you and your brat managed to kill these Leaf-nin, or these Leaf-nin managed to kill you. What, you seriously thought I'd pay you that much money just to kill a measly bridge builder? I wasn't ever going to pay you in the first place!"

Naruto could have laughed. If there was one thing a civilian should know to NOT do when betraying a ninja they hired, it would to actually tell that ninja themselves, in person, that they never intended to pay them. That would be equivalent to committing suicide.

Gatou just basically signed his own suicide note.

"Haku. Let the kid go. They're not our enemy anymore." Zabuza called across the bridge, releasing Kakashi from their deadlock as he did.

Haku stepped out of the mirror he had been in previously, and let the mirrors splash to the ground.

"You take left, I take right?" Kakashi suggested.

Zabuza shook his head, chuckling. "Nah. Haku needs a challenge, and your brats look like they've been trained up a bit. Why don't you use this as a test, eh?"

Kakashi nodded. "Sounds like a plan. Oi! Team Seven! Have at it!"

Sasuke looked to Naruto. Naruto shrugged. Sakura ignored the both of them.

"Illusion: Demon's Terror!" she called out, redirecting the genjutsu she had been preparing for Haku, and almost instantly, the group she had targeted collapsed screaming in panic and fear. She watched the screaming men with clinical fascination.

Naruto shuddered, and moved Fox closer to the demoralized army, and fired up her flamethrower again. More screams echoed in harmony, and the smell of burning flesh and hair floated in the air while Naruto did his best to hold down his breakfast at the realization that those men were on fire and were going to die.

Sasuke sighed in relief. He just wasn't cut out for face-to-face battles.

"Sasuke, Haku looks like he's about to be overrun, you should probably go help him." Naruto said, sounding sick to his stomach.

Sasuke sighed. Of course he wasn't going to get away with doing nothing. But he darted off into the cluster of mercenaries throwing Kunai left and right, without time to think about actually killing them.

Kakashi sighed. Killing was never easy, but at least his Genin wouldn't remember the faces of their first kill, which he hoped would make it easier on them.

"First kills?" Zabuza asked.

"First C-Rank." Kakashi corrected.

"Ah." Zabuza sighed knowingly. "The curse strikes again."

"No kidding."

.

.

.

A little over three weeks later, the bridge was finished, and Team Seven, Zabuza, and Haku were walking away.

"So, what are you gonna do now?" Naruto asked Zabuza and Haku.

Zabuza shrugged. "Move on, find another mission to do. Me and Haku still need to eat. But I suppose since you Leaf-nin aren't so bad, so we'll try to keep away from situations that'll pit us against you. You ain't too bad, for a snot-nosed brat."

"Hey-!"

Kakashi nodded in return, ignoring Naruto's protests. "I'll be sure to put a good work in for you with the Hokage when I make our report. I hope to never see you on the battlefield again."

"Same to you Kakashi, same to you." Zabuza replied. "Come along, Haku. Let's get out of here before anyone changes their minds."

"Yes, Zabuza-sama."

Kakashi watched his students carefully. He hoped that at least one of them would quit delaying their panic attacks, so that he could deal with it in a safe manner, rather than them breaking down in the middle if the Chunin exams.

Especially Naruto, since they were taking place in Iwagakure this year, and Iwa had that thing against blondes from the fourth Hokage.

.

.

.

END CHAPTER TWO

6170


	4. Chunin Exams: Part One

The Hokage sighed tiredly. This batch of Genin gave him headaches, and their Jonin instructors just added to that headache. Asuma and Kurenai were flirting without flirting, as always, and as always, Kakashi was late. And also as always, Kakashi was going to give some ridiculous, stupid, impractical lie as an excuse whenever he arrived.

"Sorry I'm late folks," Kakashi said unapologetically, "I ran into this guy who obviously had escaped from a mental hospital, muttering something about a bat-man and I had to escort him back to the insane asylum before he hurt any civilians."

The Hokage ignored his unbelievable excuse, and officially began the meeting.

"We are here to nominate Genin teams for the Chunin exams. Unfortunately, the council has already preselected one team to compete, and unless the team in question drops out deliberately, then I and their Jonin sensei can say nothing on the matter."

Kakashi sagged visibly.

"That team is Team Seven. Sorry, Kakashi. I know you didn't want Naruto-kun to visit Iwagakure just yet. I'd highly suggest convincing him to… tone down his appearance. Two other teams may participate. Who else is nominating their team?"

Gai stepped forward. "I nominate my youthful team!"

Asuma and Kurenai both stepped forward.

"I do not nominate my team." Kurenai said. "Hinata needs more confidence before she can make Chunin."

Asuma took a calming breath. "I nominate my team."

"This is your last chance to back out." The Hokage warned. "You know very well that Naruto and Ino could be targeted specifically in Iwa."

"I do. Shikamaru and Choji will protect her. But I'll see about getting her to dye it or put a genjutsu over it, just in case." Asuma assured him.

Kakashi echoed a similar statement. "Sasuke and Sakura won't allow Naruto to be killed. Kitty likes him too much, and Sakura wouldn't have anyone to practice genjutsu on."

The Hokage rolled his eyes, but he understood the underlying meaning behind Kakashi's words: Team Seven was a cohesive unit, and they would protect each other no matter what. The Hokage didn't know the little details of whatever had happened in Wave, but it obviously was the catalyst to make _this_ Team Seven an actual team before any of them were killed. Or defected.

He waited a moment longer to give the Jonin senseis time to retract their nominations, then held out three sheets of paperwork to each Jonin who had nominated their team.

Gai and Asuma took theirs and used a Body Flicker to leave after a polite salute.

Kakashi lazily (everything he did that didn't involve a life-or-death situation was lazy) took the papers for his Genin and left rather quickly, with the intent to drop by each of his Genin's homes to personally deliver it, as he had given them a week off to recuperate.

Of course, he also wanted to prompt them into having their breakdown already. Especially Naruto. It would be beyond bad if he were to break down in Iwa of all places.

Because of the Fourth Hokage, Iwagakure hated blondes. It was a weird racist thing, but nobody could stop them, only avoid sending their blonde shinobi there. Konoha was at a special risk because of the Yamanaka clan, and tried to avoid sending Yamanaka into or near Iwa's borders.

.

.

.

He dropped by Naruto's place first, thinking (incorrectly) that he would take the longest to manipulate into breaking down.

Naruto looked surprised to see his teacher on his windowsill.

"Kakashi-sensei? What are you…" yawn, "…doing here?"

Kakashi smiled. "Did you know the Chunin exams were coming up?"

"No. what's that got to do with anything?"

"I nominated you three. I'm here to deliver the paperwork."

Naruto lit up, and woke up rather quickly. "Well, hand it over sensei! We are so gonna ace this!"

"But before I give you this," Kakashi continued as if the blonde had never spoken, "we need to have a long-delayed chat about what happened in Wave."

Naruto winced, and he could have sworn he heard screaming and the scent of burning flesh. "What talk?"

"You know what talk. Let's discuss this inside your apartment, hm?"

Naruto dejectedly stepped aside and allowed Kakashi into his (ridiculously messy) apartment.

"We can talk in the kitchen, Kakashi-sensei." Naruto said quietly. "Sorry about the mess. I never have time to clean up with all the training and missions we do."

Kakashi waved that off. "We'll work on your organizational skills later. Do you know what happened on the bridge?"

"Yeah."

"Then tell me."

Naruto swallowed. "Sakura made a bunch of the mercs freak out with her genjutsu, while I…. I…. I set them on fire. Sasuke killed a bunch of them with kunai while he was helping Haku. Is that what you wanted to hear, Kakashi-sensei?"

Kakashi tilted his head in acknowledgement. "Mostly. Naruto, those men you set on fire died. It was your first kill…s. To borrow a phrase that I heard from somewhere, you're lucky it was a hot kill and not a cold kill. It was also much easier because there were multiple enemies, instead of just one."

"What's the difference?" Naruto asked. If it weren't so disconcerting to see Naruto so… kicked-puppy-like, Kakashi almost wished he'd stay this calm all the time. "And I would have figured it'd be worse to kill a bunch of people instead of just one?"

Kakashi shook his head. "Let me tell you about my first kill, Naruto. I was eight. It was wartime, and I was one of the lucky ones who got their first kill during battle. But I can still remember his face to this day. He had red hair, and was literally covered in freckles. He couldn't have been much older than me, and he was the enemy.

"He came charging at me, and I remember thinking, 'what an idiot' and pulling a kunai up. And the stupid redhead was an idiot- he ran right into my kunai. His blood got all over my gloves and arm, and the only thing I was thinking about was how much of a pain in the ass it was going to be to get that blood out of my clothes. It wasn't until later, when we set up camp that I panicked.

"My sensei sat me down and talked me down. My teammates were so unnerved that, I, the soulless, genius Kakashi, panicked at my first kill."

Naruto was listening in awe. He couldn't believe that Kakashi could be unnerved by anything.

"So, if you need to freak out…"

Naruto shook his head. "No thanks, Kakashi-sensei. I beat the shit out of a training dummy. But thanks for offering anyway. If you really want someone to freak out on you, it's gonna be Sakura-chan. I heard Sasuke setting fires in the Uchiha complex earlier, so he's probably okay."

Kakashi, like the Hokage so many years ago, was surprised at Naruto's foresight. "You're welcome. And thanks for the tip."

"No problem, Kakashi-sensei. The paperwork?"

.

.

.

Sakura was obviously from a civilian family. She still lived with her parents, and her parent's house was located in a heavily civilian area of Konoha.

Not to say that Sakura was a bad kunoichi from it. If anything, it gave her the softer edge that Team Seven needed.

"FUCK! Shit, ow, goddamn-!"

Kakashi sincerely hoped that voice wasn't who he thought it was.

"Anko-nii-chan, I told you that you were going to slice your tongue open licking kunai like that!"

That voice was exactly who he thought it was. Stifling a sigh, Kakashi knocked politely at Sakura's front door. That's what civilians expected people to do, right?

"Kakashi-san? What are you doing here so late?" Sakura's mother asked, wiping her hands off on a dishtowel.

Kakashi smiled disarmingly. "Drop off some paperwork, and I wanted to talk to Sakura about the mission she just got back from."

Sakura's mother waved him off. "If it's about her first kill, Anko-chan already had her screaming and crying, and I don't want a repeat of that. You can still run whatever paperwork you have to give her up to her, though. First bedroom on the right."

Kakashi already knew that, but thanked the woman nonetheless.

"Is that Kakashi's footsteps I hear?" Anko asked from the other side of Sakura's door.

The door opened, and Sakura's head popped out. "Oh. Hello Kakashi-sensei."

Her eyes were red, and she had tear streaks on her cheeks. He decided to not mention it.

"Paperwork for the Chunin exams." He explained. "I was also going to see how you were doing after the Wave mission, but Anko seems to have handled it."

"The breakdown? Yeah, thanks for the warning, by the way." Sakura grumbled.

Kakashi scratched the back of his head in embarrassment. "Well, I was waiting to get back to Konoha and let you have a while to cool off."

"It's fine, sensei. Thanks for looking in on me anyway. I appreciate it."

"Okay, go away now Kakashi! We've got girl stuff to talk about!"

Kakashi paled and shoved the paperwork intended for Sakura into her hands before using a Body Flicker to escape.

Boy was he glad he escaped before they started talking. He had once overheard a "girl talk" and it had been the most horrifying thing his ears had ever heard, and he had heard people screaming while lit on fire and dying. It was pretty hard to top that.

.

.

.

Sasuke was the last, and Kakashi (incorrectly) thought he'd be the easiest to talk to about what had happened in Wave.

Sasuke greeted him coldly, with none of the hidden warmth he spoke to his other teammates with. "Kakashi-sensei."

"Sasuke!" Kakashi chirped, smiling. "I have paperwork for you!"

The Genin stared at him blandly. "Then give it to me."

"But first I wanted to talk to you about what happened in Wave."

Immediately, Sasuke stiffened, and glowered at him. Even Kitty, who normally tolerated him at worst, and purred d at him at best, spat and hissed at him.

"There's nothing to talk about." Sasuke replied firmly.

Perhaps some levity would help? "Right. Because the sounds of the enemy screaming combined with the smell of burning flesh is nothing. Of course, silly me."

"I said that there is nothing to talk about."

"And I'm saying that you're lying." Maybe he should pull out the big guns. Sasuke needed this, whether he wanted to admit it or not. "Of course, if you want to turn out like your brother, then you're right. But I think that that is a Very Bad Idea."

Sasuke whipped his head back around to stare at him with wide eyes.

Bingo. Hit the nail on the head.

"Oh yeah. His first kill? Didn't even flinch, and kept on going. I heard rumors that he didn't even stop to wipe the other man's blood off."

"What did you want to talk about, Kakashi?"

Well. Sasuke was in a mood- no honorifics?

Kakashi decided to be serious. Sasuke would handle it better. "Sasuke Uchiha, you killed at least ten of those mercenaries with your kunai, and I'm pretty sure I saw you throw a couple of fireballs. It was your first kill, and as your squad leader, I need to know how stable you are. And as your sensei, I need to know if you're doing okay."

Sasuke wilted visibly. "Kakashi-sensei, what did you do after your first kill?"

Oh, back to honorifics?

"I puked."

Sasuke seemed surprised. "Really?"

"Yes. Not until I got home, and somehow my sensei broke into my apartment to leave me chocolate- he thought chocolate fixed everything. Probably because his girlfriend told him that all the time. Even so, it got me through that ordeal without embarrassment."

Sasuke glared weakly. "Why couldn't you have done that with me?"

"The main reason? You didn't puke. The other reason? Because I knew you wouldn't let yourself break down."

Sasuke looked away in embarrassment.

"I was right, wasn't I?"

Kitty meowed confidently. Sasuke threw her a glare, muttering "traitor".

"So, Sasuke…"

"I- I didn't even notice until it was all done that I had- I had actually killed them. I know I have to kill That Man, but, it was more of an abstract concept until I actually killed." Sasuke muttered, cherry red in embarrassment. "I'm not sure how I feel about it."

"Any guilt?"

"Some. But I knew I had to kill them. I couldn't let Naruto and Haku get overrun."

Kakashi smiled in utter relief. Sasuke was going to be just fine. "Good. I think you'll be okay. But, let me know if you get the urge to go killing people for the fun of it, alright? I'd get in so much trouble if you did that, it's not even funny."

Sasuke snorted.

"Anyway here. This is the paperwork I'm supposed to give you." Kakashi shoved the last piece of paperwork into his hands before Body Flickering away.

.

.

.

Team Seven arrived all at once at the little red bridge.

Sasuke and Naruto seemed subdued, and Sakura did _not_ like that.

"What's got your panties in a twist?" she asked, putting on her best "Anko Face".

Naruto was a little shocked at the way Sakura was talking, but it got him out of his funk a little. "Sakura, are you okay?"

"I'm fine. It's you two who are being a bunch of emo kids." Sakura grouched. "So spit it out. Did Kakashi-sensei visit you last night too?"

"Yeah, but I don't see what…"

"So he talked to you about your first kill?"

Naruto and Sasuke blanched a little.

"Uh huh. Come on boys, you're ninja. I'll tell you like Anko-nii-chan told me; at least you had fun."

Sasuke leaned over to Naruto so that Sakura wouldn't hear him. "I think this Anko person is a smidge crazy."

"No, you think?" Naruto replied just as quietly, with a sarcastic ring.

"Hey, pay attention! We still have to go over Naruto's little signing issue before Kakashi-sensei arrives."

"Yeah, yeah. Calm down, Sakura-chan."

This was the scene Kakashi arrived to. He kept to the trees to watch his team.

Sakura was surprisingly kind and mellow after being taught by Anko (he shuddered. Anko was scary!). She slowly walked Naruto through several academy exercises for Leaf hand signs, and corrected whatever words the boy missed or used the wrong sign for.

Naruto in turn, surprisingly, taught Sakura and Sasuke the Sand hand signs, which were surprisingly similar to Leaf, and had many signs which meant a different thing in Leaf. It was mildly baffling, which could explain why Naruto got so frustrated with Leaf Signing.

Kakashi decided to give them enough time to get Naruto caught up on the more basic phrases before he dropped in.

"Hello my-!"

"You're late, Kakashi-sensei." Sakura said disapprovingly. "Do you know how to sign in Sand Signs?"

Kakashi blinked. That was rather abrupt. "I do."

"Good. That's one less teammate to worry about." Sakura muttered. "Now it's just me and Sasuke who have to catch up."

Kakashi smiled. "Before we get to training, did you guys fill out that paperwork?"

"Of course, Kakashi-sensei." Naruto snorted. "We don't want to miss the Chunin exams, no way!"

He muted a sigh. He really didn't want Naruto to participate, especially after he heard Naruto's boasting to Zabuza about being in their bingo book. Which reminded him…

"One last thing before we get to training, Naruto, you told Zabuza that you were in the Iwa bingo book. How did that happen?" Kakashi asked, acting like he was just asking offhandedly. It would be better if Naruto didn't know how worried he was about that.

"Huh? Oh, Iwa sent a bunch of kidnappers while I was in Sand, and I kicked their asses." Naruto replied, like kicking Iwa kidnappers' asses were nothing.

"How, though?" Sakura asked, incredulously. "You couldn't have been much older than ten!"

Naruto shrugged. "The first one was when I was six. Chiyo-sensei kicked that guy's ass, actually. The next one was when I was seven- there were a bunch when I was seven- and Chiyo-sensei let me borrow her puppet so I could kick his ass myself. Also, it was a test. Chiyo-sensei's a little crazy, you know. And then I just kept kicking their asses until they stopped sending them when I was ten. Then I came back here."

"What's you bingo book entry say?" Kakashi asked curiously.

"I dunno. Let me find my Iwa bingo book…"

Naruto pulled a single scroll from his bag and glared at it before just tossing it so that it would spread out along the ground.

Sasuke and Sakura's eyes could have popped out of their heads.

Naruto, meanwhile, was walking along the scroll, which was filled with hundreds of seals with labels below them. About halfway to the end, he let out a shout of triumph and placed his hand on a seal, releasing its contents: a book.

"I need to make a more organized storage scroll. Sorry about the dramatic-ness of that. There's really no other way to find something without taking forever." Naruto explained, handing Kakashi the little book, which Kakashi recognized as a bingo book from Iwa of all places.

"Where'd you even get this?"

"Black market in Suna." Naruto replied, like that was an everyday thing. It might _have_ been an everyday thing for him. "Chiyo-sensei thought I should know what my enemies thought of me, so she made me buy that thing. And it was expensive, so don't ruin it!"

Kakashi calmly flipped through it until he found Naruto's entry.

"Uzumaki, Naruto. Male, blonde hair, blue eyes. Chunin level," Kakashi gave Naruto a cockeyed glance at that, but kept reading, "lived in Suna for several years before returning to Konoha, is known as 'Konoha's Puppeteer' due to initial kidnapping attempts. Approach with caution command for any ninja under Chunin."

Naruto shrugged. "Not my fault they sent a bunch of Genin after me. Who sends Genin on kidnaping missions anyway, huh?"

Kakashi just shook his head. Naruto could be so surprising sometimes.

.

.

.

After much arguing and bickering, Kakashi convinced Naruto to wear a hat that covered all of his hair. Kakashi supposed he couldn't really argue the silly-looking fox-eared knit cap his student found. And a month later, after Kakashi had drilled as much as he could about Iwagakure into his Genins' heads, they were on the road with Gai and Asuma's team.

"So, Ino." Sakura said with a tone that meant she was going to start some trouble, "what missions have you done?"

Ino smirked, "we've done _three_ C-Ranks, forehead. You?"

"Oh, no C-Ranks." Sakura replied airily.

Ino grinned, thinking she had the upper hand.

"But we did get to do an A-Rank."

Ino's jaw dropped, and the other Genin turned to look at Sakura incredulously.

"You're joking." Shikamaru said flatly.

"Nope." Sakura chirped. "It _was_ a C-Rank, but it got bumped up to an A-Rank after we had to fight Zabuza Momochi and kill a hell-ton of mercenaries."

You could hear a pin drop in the silence that followed.

Kakashi held back a grin. This could be fun. He sighed dramatically. "Sakura, what have I told you about stretching the truth?"

Ino brightened, "yeah, forehead! You got an A-Rank, yeah right!"

"You should always use numbers instead of vague units. You killed twenty or so of those mercenaries with your demonic illusion, Naruto caught about fifty of them on fire with Fox, though I'm sure I saw Sasuke adding to the flames with some fire jutsu, and he and Haku killed twenty or so each." He chided, internally giggling like an Academy Student.

Now Gai and Asuma were giving him frightened looks. Kakashi mentally gave himself a high-five.

"No way…" Choji breathed. "You guys really did that?"

Naruto puffed his chest out and Sasuke tried to hide a proud smirk.

"Oh my god you really did." Gai's female student gasped. "How did you even survive Zabuza Momochi?"

"Kakashi-sensei fought with him mostly, but we still kicked his ass the first time! Kakashi sensei got caught in this jutsu-!"

"Water Prison Technique." Sakura interjected.

"-and me and Sakura and Sasuke made him let go so Kakashi-sensei could finish kicking his ass. And I could have done it on my own, but Sasuke decided to be a dick and throw a Fuuma shuriken at him, and I was like, 'you asshole what'd you do that for!?' and he was like, 'you took too long', and I was gonna kick his ass later too but I decided to be nice and not…"

Naruto kept chattering on (for three days) until they reached the border between Wind country and Fire country. The others either learned how to tune Naruto out (like Sasuke and Sakura had in the first week of being teammates) or were on the verge of snapping.

Four ninja greeted them, much to Team Ten and Team Gai's relief.

"Kankuro!" Naruto shouted, waving wildly.

The ninja in black waved. "Naruto! Nice to see you again. Make any more puppets?"

"Yeah, but I need a nice, tattered looking cloak before I use him in battle. Intimidation factor, yanno? Speaking of, do you still have that old cloak you said I could have when you get your Puppet Corps uniform?" Naruto asked.

"Yeah, hold on let me find it. It's in one of these damn scrolls; I was saving it for you…"

Meanwhile, Shikamaru and Choji were greeting Gaara.

"Hey look, it's our friend with the troublesome sand." Shikamaru said playfully.

In reply, Gaara wrapped a tendril of sand around Shikamaru's foot and yanked him up into the air.

Temari sucked in a terrified breath.

"Aw, Gaara, come on. He was just kidding." Choji laughed. "Chip?"

Gaara silently took the offered chip and let Shikamaru down gently.

Shikamaru glared at him. "Troublesome."

"Oh man, thanks Kankuro! You're the best!"

"Damn straight I am. Not that it's hard when you're the only main competitor."

"Hey what that supposed to mean, asshole? I kicked your ass during practice nine times out of ten! And that's only cause the other one out of ten was when I first started!"

"You wanna go, blondie?"

"Fuck you! I'll kick your ass!"

Kakashi was starting to grow worried when the Suna team's Jonin sensei shook his head.

"Those two are always like that." Baki promised. "If they do fight, which they might, then it's not like Naruto will get hurt anyway. He's immune to poisons."

Kakashi nodded, relieved. He didn't want his student to be the cause of a war between Suna and Konoha.

"Yeah, come on! Right here, right now, short stuff!"

Naruto growled. "Get back, guys. Don't want Kankuro to _poison you_."

"Are you serious!? It was one time, _one time_! That stupid civilian shouldn't have gotten in the way!"

"You shouldn't have been using poisons outside of the training grounds, dipshit!"

Kankuro whipped out a scroll and pulled his puppet, Crow, who was a mess of arms and legs, covered with a moth-eaten cloak from it.

Naruto replied in turn with Fox

Sakura and Sasuke moved very far away from him and his puppet, dragging the other Konoha Genin with them, regardless of protests.

"You do not want to be near that thing." Sasuke promised, speaking for the first time that day.

Naruto paused to look behind him. "Don't worry; I'm not mean enough to set Kankuro's favorite puppet on fire, so she's not going to be _that_ dangerous."

"What!? You actually put a flamethrower in Fox!?" Kankuro shouted fearfully.

"Yep! Let's go!"

Both puppeteers lashed out at the same time.

Fox instantly caught one of Crow's arms in her teeth, and yanked it off.

"Oh man, you're fixing that, you little monster!"

Sakura jerked in surprise when Naruto didn't even blink at the insult that typically set him off.

"Yeah, yeah! Whatever, cat-ears!"

Crow launched a brace of kunai at Fox, taking her ear off- the same ear Zabuza took off.

"Damn it! Again!?"

Kankuro laughed. "Again? You mean her ear's already been ripped off once? The hell kinda missions you been doing, huh?"

"Fighting Zabuza Momochi, that's what!"

"Liar!"

"I am not! Sasuke, Sakura, back me up here!"

Sasuke nodded, and Sakura grinned.

Crow tore Fox's side open, revealing metal and wood innards.

"Oh, you asshole! You're fixing that! Fur is a bitch to sew!"

"Don't you remember the last time you made me fix fur? You said I'd never be allowed near a needle and thread again!"

"Oh. Right. Well-" Fox pinned Crow down and let out a burst of flame above his head. "Then I'm not fixing Crow! Give?"

"I give! Don't catch Crow on fire; my other puppet isn't done yet!"

Fox let Crow go and trotted back to Naruto.

Kankuro let out a sigh of relief. "Ah, it's nice to have a lively battle. Everyone else back home sucks."

Naruto grinned. "That's 'cause I'm not there."

"Alright, boys. You done here? It's another two hours through the desert until we get to Sunagakure." Baki said, walking to stand between Fox and Crow. "You guys are going to want to rest before we start moving into Earth Country. And why on earth hasn't that girl changed her hair yet? Don't you know how dangerous it is to go into Iwa with blonde hair?"

Ino huffed. "No way am I covering my beautiful hair!"

Baki shook his head. "Better ugly than dead. In Iwagakure, because of your Fourth Hokage, blondes born in Iwa are killed at birth, and all the older ninja have a kill-on-sight instinct when they see blonde. Naruto's got the right idea, covering it up."

The nine Konoha Genin were shocked. One thought ran through their minds: 'Killed at birth?'

"Aw, Baki-sensei. We've heard you ranting about that enough, okay? I don't want to be scarred for life any more than I already am."

Naruto finally noticed Temari, or rather, her hair.

"AH! Temari-nii-chan! Your- your hair!"

Temari touched her hair gingerly. "It's horrible, isn't it? I look terrible!"

"No, no!" Naruto shrieked, backpedaling. That's not what he meant at all! "It's not bad, just- it's red! Like Gaara's!"

Temari shrugged. "We are siblings."

Naruto was still in shock when they started walking again. The other eight Genin enjoyed the silence while it lasted.

.

.

.

"Oh yeah, by the way," Kankuro mumbled quietly shortly after the group entered Sunagakure, "Chiyo-sensei wants to see you. The last I heard she wanted to give you something. Dunno what, though."

Naruto perked up. "I'll see you guys later, okay? What's our hotel?"

"The Sand Dog. On Eighth Street."

"Wait, Naruto! How are you gonna know how to get there?" Ino shouted before he could run off completely.

Naruto spun and walked backwards for a minute to reply. "I used to live here a couple of years ago! I know my way around! Sakura, Sasuke! I'll bring food; I know this great place that does takeout, okay?"

"Yeah, sure. Don't be too late, or we'll eat without you!" Sakura replied.

Naruto threw a thumbs up over his shoulder before darting around a corner.

Chiyo-sensei's place was difficult to get to, if you didn't know wall walking (or tree walking, as Konoha ninja called it). Naruto had no problem, of course. He'd been wall walking ages before anyone else because of his dismal natural chakra control. With the amount of chakra he had, it was damn near impossible to keep such immaculate control over his chakra without a lot of training.

"Chiyo-sensei!" Naruto called out cautiously. Chiyo could be a cranky old lady sometimes and a sweet grandmotherly woman other times.

"Naruto-chan! I'm in my workshop! Come here, I have something for you!"

Looks like she was in a mood to be a sweet grandmother. Naruto silently fist-pumped. He hit the jackpot today!

She still didn't like to be kept waiting, however. It was a habit he picked up from her. "Coming Chiyo-sensei!"

Chiyo was at her worktable, which was covered in bits of wood, metal, kunai, shuriken, what looked like parts of a flamethrower, senbon, a handful of snake-puppets (one of which Naruto recognized to be his- he had been wondering where it went), and something fairly large with a white tarp over it.

"Naruto! My, how you've grown!" Chiyo exclaimed warmly.

She glared at him, killing intent rolling off of her like waves. "Have you been practicing?"

"Y-yes, Chiyo-sensei!" Naruto stuttered. "I've even finished a second puppet!"

Chiyo brightened. "Let me see! What's its name?"

"I've been calling him Blade." Naruto explained. He knew he was odd for giving his puppets personalities and genders, but that's what he believed made his puppets so strong. "I used my teammate, Sasuke as a base, because he's so godda- freaking fast."

He pulled Blade's scroll from his tiny side bag and released him from it.

He was humanoid in structure, but his fingernails were made from sharpened metal, and he had a pair of swords on his back. Naruto quickly took the cloak Kankuro had given him earlier and tossed it around Blade's shoulders, fastening it on the bolts he had made specifically for the cloak.

Chiyo circled it like a vulture circled carrion.

Naruto stood with baited breath. It was the first puppet he had made without Chiyo's permission.

"It's extremely well made for your first unsupervised puppet. I'd have used less colors, but I know how you are with colors, so it's fine."

Naruto sighed in relief and tucked Blade back into his scroll. "Thanks Chiyo-sensei!"

Chiyo waved him off. "No need to thank me. You're its creator. Now, do you want to see your Genin graduation present?"

Naruto lit up. "Chiyo-sensei! You didn't have to…"

"I wanted to." He elderly woman replied sternly. "It's not like I have much else to do, and I think you have the potential to become an extraordinary puppeteer."

Naruto reddened from the compliments.

"Ready?" Chiyo asked with a mischievous ring in her voice.

"Yes! Yes! Yes!"

With a flourish, Chiyo swiped the white tarp from the pile and Naruto stared in awe.

It was a puppet made to resemble a weasel. Chiyo had made it flawlessly, as she always did. The fur was more realistically put together than Fox's, and Naruto was one hundred percent positive that it'd move much smoother than anything in his arsenal.

"I didn't name it. That's up to you, kid."

"Chiyo-sensei… I- I don't- he's perfect!"

Chiyo ruffled Naruto's hair while he was still shell shocked and couldn't protest. "Name it, kid. And let me take a look at Fox, while you're playing with it."

Silently, Naruto handed Fox's scroll to Chiyo and went over to inspect the new puppet- his new puppet- while Chiyo clucked over Fox's state, stitching up the gash in her fur that Kankuro had made during the earlier battle.

His fur was a reddish brown color, and when Naruto sent out strings to him, and moved him, he moved so smoothly, like none of his other puppets. The last time he had had a puppet that moved that smoothly was when Chiyo handed him one of her puppets the second time a kidnapper came for him and told him to kick his ass.

"Key." Naruto said suddenly. "His name is Key."

Grinning ear to ear, he found his stash of empty scrolls on his storage scroll, and selected one just for Key, and fixed it up for him.

Chiyo ruffled Naruto's hair again, handing him Fox's scroll. "Well, as nice as it was to see you again, you should get back to your teammates with that food you promised them."

"How'd you know- oh shi- crap you're right! Bye Chiyo-sensei, thank you so much!"

Chiyo chuckled at the sight of Naruto leaping off of the plateau her home was built on, screaming wildly likely scaring a bunch of stupid civilians away until they realized it was the kid who always wore orange back from Konoha.

Shaking her head, she muttered, "Some things never change."

.

.

.

Naruto burst through the door, startling Sakura into dropping the book she was reading.

"I'm not too late am I?" Naruto panted.

"No." Sasuke replied calmly. Sakura glared at him. He probably heard their teammate coming.

"Good, cause this stuff's good. It's noodles with stuff in it, but it's not ramen, it's called Lo Mein! I got chicken for Sakura, cause you always get chicken ramen, and I got shrimp for Sasuke because- same reason, and beef for sensei!" Naruto continued babbling, but Sakura ignored it in favor of opening the box offered to her and eating.

"This is good!" she exclaimed after a bite.

"Isn't it? Hey, hey, Sasuke! You and Kitty like it?"

Sasuke nodded silently, as he was prone to. Sakura wondered how she got stuck with both the quietest and loudest teammates.

"Hey, keep it down!" someone shouted from the room next door, "We're trying to sleep!"

"Sorry Ino-pig!" Sakura replied loudly. "You're gonna need that beauty sleep, aren't you?"

It always gave her mild vindictive satisfaction to hear Ino spluttering at the insult, even through a wall.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and kept his amusement to himself, calmly picking bits of shrimp out for Kitty to eat.

The whole thing flew over Naruto's head, so he ignored it.

"Anyway, Chiyo-sensei got me a new puppet! For making Genin! Wanna see him?" he chattered excitedly.

Sasuke shrugged. "Sure."

Sakura, her mouth full of Lo Mein, nodded.

"Yes!" Naruto cheered, grinning madly.

A puff of smoke later, and a four foot long weasel stood next to Naruto.

"I named his Key!"

Sasuke tensed up and his jaw flexed angrily.

"Sasuke? You okay there?" Naruto asked, honestly worried.

"…I'm fine. Weasels bring up bad memories." Sasuke replied after a moment.

Naruto deflated. "Oh. I guess I won't use him that much then."

Sasuke felt a little guilty, but he still couldn't stand weasels after what That Man did That Night. He'd make it up to Naruto, though. Maybe with a couple of Fox pelts. He always was complaining about faux fur being too brittle…

Naruto sealed Key back up, and started eating his Lo Mein sadly.

There was still a little tension in the air when the three Genin finally fell asleep.

.

.

.

Kankuro noticed the disappointed face Naruto was trying to hide from his fellow Konoha Genin.

"Hey, monster!" he called. He noticed Naruto's two teammates tensed up whenever he called Naruto that. Kankuro shrugged it off. Naruto was a little touchy if anyone else but him called him that. Kankuro didn't really care why. Gaara had an actual monster sealed in him.

"What, asshat?" Naruto called back.

"c'mere!"

Naruto huffed, but said something to his teammates before sprinting to catch up with Kankuro. "What, man?"

"What's wrong? You look like that time Chiyo-sensei said you shouldn't put fur on puppets, minus your 'I'm gonna do it anyway' look."

Naruto sagged slightly. "Chiyo-sensei gave me a puppet, but it brings up bad memories for Sasuke, so I can't use it when he's around. And, before you say, 'well fuck him, it's your puppet do whatever you want with it', I don't want to piss off one of my only friends from Konoha."

Kankuro was confused, and said so. "Why's it bring up bad memories?"

"Hell if I know. But apparently, it had to do with weasels." Naruto grinned mischievously. "Key's a weasel. Chiyo even put _fur_ on him."

"Chiyo-sensei did what!?"

While Kankuro was freaking out and while Naruto was laughing at him, Sasuke and Sakura were talking quietly together.

"Sasuke, why don't you like weasels?" Sakura asked bluntly.

Sasuke cast her a sideways glare, but felt compelled to answer her. She was his teammate, after all. "Remember our first day as a team, before the bell test?"

"Yeah. We introduced ourselves and Kakashi-sensei was being useless. Why?"

"My brother's name is Itachi."

"And Itachi means weasel. I see. But are you really going to take it out on Naruto's puppet? I mean, honestly. If anything, he'd let you beat the shit out of the thing. Well, not completely. But you know what I mean." Sakura scolded. "It's silly to hate a puppet because it's a weasel."

Sasuke looked away. "I know."

"So…?" Sakura trailed off, giving Sasuke a Look.

He sighed. "I'll make it up to him."

Sakura huffed, but thought, 'I suppose that's all I'll get out of him.'

"Hey guys! What 'cha talkin' about?" Naruto sang from behind them, causing Sakura to jump violently, though Sasuke didn't even blink, as usual, as he saw him coming.

"Naruto! Don't do that!" Sakura screeched, swinging for his head, though he ducked just in time, "Sasuke's stealthier than you and even he doesn't scare the crap out of me! I swear to god, if you do that one more time, I'm gonna…"

"But I'm not doing it on purpose!" Naruto protested. "It's not my fault you're jumpy!"

"Jumpy? I'll show you jumpy!"

Sasuke sighed and looked down to Kitty. "Why me?"

"Meow."

Neji sneered. "You still got that stray rat, Uchiha?"

Naruto, still running, heard. "Oooh, you're gonna get it, Hyuuga!"

Sakura stopped chasing Naruto to watch Sasuke lose it, as he inevitably would. He loved Kitty to pieces, and the last time someone had insulted her… well, it wasn't pretty.

Sasuke sneered silently at the other boy. "How childish. You are a Genin of Konoha, act like it."

Naruto and Sakura traded impressed glances.

"You didn't try to kill him. Good job, Sasuke!" Naruto said sincerely.

Sasuke smirked, and started signing, 'fox-boy, what's the cure to your paralysis concoction?'

Naruto replied automatically in the same fashion. He was glad that Sakura had insisted upon all of them learning Sasuke's Uchiha dialect and Naruto's Sand dialect. 'Muscle relaxers, it's cancels out the paralysis. I told you that ages ago, why are you asking no- oh. Oh ho! Cat, so I detect an inner prankster?'

Sakura giggled, and it sent a chill down Kakashi's spine. He couldn't hear what they were talking about, but whatever it was, it couldn't be good.

"Kakashi, what are your students doing? When did you teach them to sign?" Asuma asked incredulously.

"I didn't. Doesn't the academy teach signing? And don't you have all clan kids? They should have picked up their clans dialects ages ago." Kakashi replied, turning a page in his book. "Even Sakura knows standard Konoha signs."

Asuma snorted. "No. my team doesn't know any signing, except Shikamaru, and he only knows a little bit!"

Kakashi hummed. "I'm going to guess that either you-know-who taught Sasuke, or his tutor did. Sakura learned from Anko or Ibiki, I assume, and Naruto likely learned from his teacher in Sand. Oh well. It keeps them quiet, and they can plot to kill Gai's Genin. Or prank him. Naruto does look a little excited."

Naruto was rubbing his hands together evilly.

"Yeah. Kakashi, I've got to admit. Your students are not normal."

Kakashi smiled. "All ninja are abnormal. It's a prerequisite for becoming a Genin. Or haven't you noticed all of the boring civilian born kids are weeded out every year?"

"Oh my god." Asuma was gaping. Kakashi snickered at his comrade.

"Kakashi! My Eternal Rival! It is very unyouthful of you to trick Asuma-san!" Gai shouted.

Kakashi slowly looked up. "I'm sorry, did you say something?"

When they stopped for the night, Sasuke quietly offered to cook.

Kakashi agreed readily. Asuma was a little worried for Gai's student, who had been the one to insult Sasuke's cat, but also agreed, albeit reluctantly. Gai had no arguments, as he had been regaling Baki with some truly incredulous story during Sasuke and Neji's interaction.

"Naruto. Do you have a set of spices in your scroll?" Sasuke asked.

Naruto grinned.

"Yeah. Let me get it for you!" he said, taking a thick scroll from his little bag, searching through it.

Tenten seemed very interested in it, but didn't say anything.

"Here you go!" Naruto exclaimed after a minute.

Sasuke nodded. "Thanks."

Kitty meowed.

"You're welcome!"

Nobody noticed Sasuke dropping a powder into Neji's bowl of stew.

During Asuma's watch, at around midnight, Neji leapt up and ran a little into the desert and behind a rock.

Asuma sighed.

.

.

.

The next morning started off nicely, minus Neji being extremely annoyed and needing to run behind boulders every half hour or so. Around noon-ish, everyone was getting tired, especially Naruto, having literally the least physical endurance of the convoy.

"Man, how far away is this damn place, huh?" Naruto complained. "My feet are getting tired!"

"Ride Fox." Sasuke suggested.

Naruto looked like he had been hit with a sack of bricks.

Ten minutes later, Naruto was sitting on Fox's back quietly.

"What's got you so quiet, little monster?" Kankuro asked, catching up to him.

Naruto replied slowly. "This actually takes a little bit of concentration. I'll get the hang of it in a minute, I think."

"Stop!" and unfamiliar voice shouted from the sparse trees. "This is the Land of Stone; all Leaf Village Shinobi must have a passport and a scroll detailing their reason for being here!"

Lazily, Kakashi held up a scroll. "Chunin exams. We've all got our passports."

Recognizing that as a cue, Team Seven took their passports out of their pockets, and held them up, Gai and his team and Team Ten mimicking them.

The owner of the voice dropped down from the tree, which was much shorter than any of the Konoha shinobi were used to, and glanced at their passports. Then he snatched the mission scroll from Kakashi, and reluctantly let them pass.

"Blondie there better cover up that hair." He sneered. "The villagers won't be kind with her if they see it."

Asuma heard both the threat and the warning, and took Ino aside.

"Well? Get going." The Iwa Nin snapped bitterly. "And don't think I don't recognize you, Copy-nin Kakashi."

Kakashi smiled, and walked past him, Team Seven close on his heels, eyeing the Iwa shinobi warily.

Naruto yanked down on the sides of his fox-eared hat nervously, absent-mindedly controlling Fox. He did not like the idea of going to Iwagakure while being blonde, but he didn't want to miss out on the Chunin exams, and dying his hair wouldn't last long enough, nor would having Sakura drop a genjutsu over it.

"Relax." Sasuke murmured. "You'll give yourself away like that.

"yeah, well you try being blonde, bastard!" Naruto hissed back.

Sasuke just leveled him a Look, and Naruto quieted.

Sakura rolled her eyes. "You two are such children."

"You're a child!" Naruto retorted… childishly.

"hn." Sasuke added, glaring.

Sakura held her hands up in appeasement. "Hey, I'm just calling it like I see it."

Kakashi chuckled. "Now, now. Don't kill each other, my cute little Genin."

"Would you _kindly_ quit calling us that, sensei!?" Sakura snapped. "And if you don't, I can just tell Anko that you're harassing me when we get back to Konoha."

None of the Genin could tell, but Kakashi paled. Asuma laughed outright at him, and Gai went on some rant about protecting comrades, even from other comrades or something. Baki snorted, but he didn't really understand the fear male Konoha shinobi had of Anko Mitarashi.

"Get a move on, Leaf Shinobi." The Iwa ninja growled. "It's annoying enough to deal with the Chunin exams, and we don't need stray Konoha ninja wandering the Land of Stone."

"Sorry, Iwa-nin." Asuma said (falsely) politely. "Come along, Genin."

The Land of Stone was at once both similar and dissimilar to the forests around Konoha. Yes, there were trees, but the trees were sparse, and short, and didn't have leaves, but little, dark green spines. And there were hills everywhere, which none of the Konoha shinobi nor the Sand shinobi were used to.

After a while, when even Neji and Tenten, who were used to Gai's training methods, were breathing a little harder, Sakura growled and tossed a rock at Naruto to get his attention.

Naruto yelped, and Fox nearly collapsed when he lost his attention for a moment, "Aaah! Sakura! What was that for!?"

"Can Fox- carry me- too?" She panted.

Naruto blinked. "I suppose so. I mean. She is made mostly of metal. You want a ride, Sasuke?"

Sasuke grunted.

"Alright then. Your loss." Naruto shrugged.

Fox knelt down and Sakura sat back to back with Naruto, sighing in relief.

The other Leaf Genin glared at Sakura for daring to ask, and the Leaf Jonin rolled their eyes at what they perceived as Kakashi passing on his laziness, while the Sand Genin collectively slapped their foreheads and copied Naruto (Gaara made a trio of giant sand tanuki).

"You'll have to get down soon." Kakashi said, idly turning a page. "We're only going to be walking for another two or three hours before stopping for the night."

Sakura huffed out a laugh. "Then that's three hours of recovery, Kakashi-sensei."

Kakashi shrugged, but true to his word, they stopped walking about five hours later. (Two hours in Kakashi-time.)

Asuma started barking out orders, "since two thirds of Team Seven and the Sand Genin are all nice and rested, you get to do all the work!"

Sasuke glared at Naruto.

Naruto sighed. "I'll do Sasuke's part. Since he walked."

.

.

.

The next day, they finally arrived at the gates of Iwagakure.

"Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura said quietly, "how come the guards are glaring at us? I thought we had an alliance with Iwa?"

"We do. They're glaring at you because I'm here. Student of the Fourth Hokage, and all that. Iwa really hates my old sensei." Kakashi explained. "He was the main reason we beat Iwa in the Third Great Shinobi War."

"Sensei!" Naruto whisper-shouted, "the Fourth Hokage was you freakin' sensei and you didn't tell us!?"

Kakashi winced. "Shh, Naruto. Yes. And if you keep quiet and don't die, I'll tell you about him when we get back to Konoha!"

Naruto froze, and straightened up from his perch on Fox's back. He pretended to zip his lips up.

"Good. Now, when we get in Iwa itself, be extremely polite, even if people are rude to you. Naruto, that means absolutely no pranks, and Sasuke, don't even think about sic'ing Kitty on anyone. Sakura, that goes for you too, no terrorizing anyone with whatever horrifying things Anko may or may not have taught you, understand?"

"Yeah, yeah, we get it, Kakashi-sensei." Naruto answered, waving his hand lazily.

Kakashi lowered his voice, and adopted a very solemn voice. "Naruto, this is serious. Anything you do wrong could be taken as an act of war. Hell, having you here could be considered an act of war. If the council hadn't insisted upon Sasuke competing, then I wouldn't have even thought about nominating you."

Sasuke stared at Kakashi, and asked, "we're here because of me and not because we're ready?"

Naruto noticed that his teammate was flaming mad, no that probably anyone else except Sakura and Kakashi could tell. Sasuke with a growly voice was the equivalent of Sakura screaming and chasing after whoever made her mad with sharp objects.

"Eh heh…" Naruto chuckled nervously. "Sasuke, calm down, huh? No need to get mad, just get payback later, when we get back to Konoha, huh?"

Sasuke visibly relaxed. "Naruto, Sakura, I'll need your assistance when we get back to Konoha."

Naruto grinned. "You got it, Lord Sasuke."

"Don't call me that."

"What, you prefer duck ass?"

Kakashi sighed in relief at the sound of Sasuke and Naruto's casual bickering.

"Passports." The guard on the left barked.

Kakashi, who somehow had managed to grab ahold of Sakura, Naruto, and Sasuke's passports, handed all three and his to the gate guard, and after he scrutinized them, the guard waved them through and took Team Ten's passports.

"Hey, Kakashi-sensei, where are we staying?" Naruto asked, having been calmed down by Sasuke, "I don't like the looks we're getting. Is my hat on all the way?"

Kakashi looked over quickly. "I don't know where we're staying, a Stone shinobi is supposed to walk us there. And yes, your hat's on."

Team Ten and Team Gai joined them inside the gate, and Gaara's team not long after.

A ninja approached them. "Your teams are competing in the Chunin exams, yeah?"

Kakashi stared at him in surprise for a long while before responding. "Yes."

"Then come along, yeah? I'm Deidara. I'll be your guide!" Deidara exclaimed cheerfully.

"Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto whispered, "Didn't you say blondes weren't well liked here?"

"I thought they weren't. I guess our information was wrong." Kakashi replied.

"I can hear you." Deidara said, still smiling. "Your information is right, I just got lucky. My parents died before they could drown me."

Naruto, Temari, and Ino paled.

The Iwa ninja smiled a little wider. "Keep your hair color hidden, blondies. You do want to wake up tomorrow, yeah?"

Sasuke and Sakura took a step closer to Naruto, and Sasuke went as far as to hand Kitty to Naruto. Team Seven knew that as a gesture of both trust and 'I'm ready to attack' from Sasuke, and Naruto would have been touched, if he wasn't still horrified.

"Would it bother you two if I gutted Fox tonight?" Naruto murmured.

Sakura nodded. "Why?"

"I'm going to build myself a safe little cubby hole. Sounds like a good idea after this, huh?"

Sasuke nodded. "I'll help, if you want."

"Yeah sure."

Deidara brought everyone's attention to him again, "and we're walking! Whoever is in charge of this crap booked each team a room. Sorry for the inconvenience, but I'm not in charge, yeah? The place you're staying at is right next door to the Academy, which is where the first trial takes place. This way, please!"

"Hey, monster!" Kankuro called, "you got a long lost brother?"

"No, what are you on, huh?"

Kankuro laughed. "You're both- uh, you know what. And you both add a stupid, unnecessary question to the end of your sentences! You say 'huh', he says 'yeah'!"

Naruto snickered. "Yeah right, man. I'm an orphan, who knows who my parents are! And he's older than me! If he had a little brother, I'm sure he'd know! Hey, Deidara-san! Did you ever have a little brother, huh?"

Deidara gave him a curious look, but shook his head. "Not that I know of. Why?"

"'cause Kankuro thinks you're my long lost brother." Naruto shrugged. "Said something about my 'huh' and your 'yeah'."

Deidara threw his hands up. "Yes! I'm not the only one, damn it! You know how hard it is to break that, yeah?"

"Yeah! Everyone's always like, 'it's a dead giveaway on a mission' and I'm like, 'well they can just go fuck themselves, huh?'"

Deidara laughed. "Kid, I like you!"

Sakura leaned over to Sasuke. "Naruto strikes again: first Zabuza and Haku, now an Iwa-nin."

Sasuke snorted.

.

.

.

END CHAPTER 3

8513


	5. Chunin Exams: Part Two

Sasuke, Sakura, and Fox walked into the academy, following the directions posted on the front doors.

"Okay, so up the first stairwell to the left," Sakura recited, "then down the hall until you reach room 218."

Fox was moving slowly, so Sakura and Sasuke kept their pace just as slow.

"God damn this is uncomfortable!" Fox said in a crackling, mechanical monotone. "I should've put cushions in, huh?"

Sakura laughed nervously. "I wonder if they're gonna let you sit in her during this test. You've got my and Sasuke's stuff stored away in a scroll, right? And you'll have the hang of sitting in Fox soon, right? And-"

"Sakura." Fox crackled, "relax. You're doing that thing you used to do in the academy where you stressed out over a test for no reason. Whatever it is, we'll pass."

Sasuke interrupted Naruto's pep talk. "There is a crowd blocking the way to 218."

"So what do we do?" Sakura asked anxiously.

Sasuke set Kitty on Fox's back and gently took Sakura's elbow. "Go around them. Genjutsu on the door number. It's actually room 210. 218 is down the hall."

He led Sakura and Fox to a parallel hallway, and were promptly stopped by Kakashi using a Body-Flicker to appear in front of them suddenly, which almost ended badly for him, as Fox let out a short belch of flame in surprise.

"Hey! At least I got the hang of it now!" Fox cheered mechanically when she saw Kakashi.

Kakashi's hair was a little singed, but he smiled nonetheless. "Well, it's nice to see your reflexes are up to par, Naruto. Anyway, congrats on making it this far, but it only gets harder from here. That room at the end of the hall is filled with other, more experienced Genin. That does not make them more qualified, or less."

He scratched his hair sheepishly, "I guess what I'm saying is that I believe in you guys. So, good luck. Oh, and, if you can, get someone to take out Gai's team? I really don't want to lose to him again. Thanks!"

Sasuke snorted.

"Kakashi-sensei is a dipshit."

Sakura blinked. "I'm going to have to get used to the mechanical voice, aren't I?"

"Yep. If I make this cubby a little more comfortable, I think I'll end up using it a lot." Fox replied. "I am the most physically weak of our team, you know."

"Yeah. I know." Sakura sighed.

They entered room 218, and immediately shied away into a corner when they saw how full it was, and the curious looks Fox and Kitty were getting. Thankfully, the other Genin looked away when the next team (from Grass) came through a minute later.

Just then, Kankuro spotted them and dragged his siblings over with him. "Well, would you look at that? You made it, monster!"

"Yes, I did."

Kankuro eyed the Leaf headband hanging around Fox's neck. "When'd you get that?"

Fox's tail flicked (Naruto was pleased that he still remembered how foxes acted well enough to translate emotions through Fox). "Kakashi-sensei gave it to me. Said it used to belong to one of his ninken that passed away a year back."

"Convenient."

"Don't mock Kakashi-sensei, huh? That's rude."

Kankuro snorted. "Since when was I polite? Are your other two teams gonna make it?"

Sasuke shrugged. "Team Ten is an Information Gathering Team, I'm sure they'll figure it out. And Gai's team has the Byakugan."

Naruto jumped in the conversation, "yeah, and Kakashi-sensei said to take out Gai's team because he doesn't want to lose a bet or something. So please kick their asses, huh?"

Kankuro agreed readily.

As Sasuke predicted, Team Ten and Gai's team both made it in before the exam proctor arrived.

A tiny, slight woman in a flak jacket and a blood red dress that was missing one of its sleeves entered, along with twenty nearly-identical Chunin in standard uniform, and glared at the room full of potential Chunin.

"Alright, settle down, Genin!" she shouted, letting a little bit of Killing Intent let slip to scare them.

Team Seven and Gaara's team hardly blinked at the weak KI. Zabuza was ten times worse than hers, and Gaara was twenty times as frightening.

"Sit with your team at a pod and we can get started! Hey, you two, where's your teammate?" she asked, pointing at Sasuke and Sakura.

They both pointed to Fox.

The Jonin grunted. "Transformation technique? Alright, that's fine."

Team Seven found a 'pod' near the back of the room and let Fox sit with her back to the wall and her head on the table before Sakura and Sasuke took seats of their own. Kitty moved from Fox's back to her head.

"Alright! Listen up, I'm only telling you all the rules once!" the proctor announced loudly. "Your goal: figure out what this code up on the board here, means! Each pod has part of the translation, since we made it a nice, easy, Romaji based code, but!"

She paused for effect, "if you get caught stealing other pod's codes, you'll be kicked out, got it? No talking, no cheating! You have one hour!"

Sakura quickly glanced down at the paper at their pod with their part of the code, memorized it, and flipped it over to hide it.

'Cat, I need the translation for A through G and P through Z.' Sakura signed, using a mix of the Uchiha dialect and the Sand dialect. 'Can you do it?'

Sasuke nodded, and waved Kitty over to whisper in her ear.

One of the three pencils provided started moving, and Sakura almost freaked out. She saw Naruto's chakra string, and stopped herself short.

Naruto had terrible handwriting, but it was legible enough that Sakura and Sasuke could read it.

'Cat-Ears has G through P' he wrote.

Sakura grinned excitedly. 'Can you get it?'

'Yeah. Will take a minute.'

'That's fine! Go for it!'

Sasuke leaned back, and Kitty jumped down silently to the floor and climbed up on top of a shelf on the wall.

'Cherry,' Sasuke motioned, 'Kitten's ready to tell me what it says whenever you're ready.'

Sakura tilted her head to the side in question.

'Inuzuka thing. I'm not supposed to talk about it.'

Sakura jerked her head back in surprise, decided to question him about it later, and handed Sasuke a pencil.

It took the three of them forty minutes of the given hour to complete the code, Naruto having taken the longest, as he was having trouble writing with a chakra string, and Sakura easily pieced it all together into the finished paragraph.

By the time they finished, over a third of the other Genin had been kicked out for cheating. It had been a few near misses for Team Seven, when one of the Chunin watching for cheaters looked at Kitty suspiciously for a while, obviously looking for one of the Village's symbols.

"Alright, ten minute mark!" the proctor announced. Several of the teams started scrambling and sweating, and ten minutes later, only half of the original amount of teams was left. Team Ten, Gai's Team, and Gaara's team still remained.

"Time! Chunin, check the translations, if you would?"

A Chunin with a serene look on her face checked Sakura's translation and smiled at them. "Good job, Konoha Genin."

"Thanks." Sakura replied with a similar smile.

As soon as the Chunin walked away, Sakura started muttering under her breath, "bitch, fuck you we did great."

"She complimented us." Sasuke stated. "Why are you cursing at her?"

Sakura waved him off. "It's a kunoichi thing. She was actually calling us bastards for passing."

Sasuke decided to never ask why Sakura was cursing at someone again. Especially if they were female.

More teams were kicked out, one by one, as the Chunin checking their translations called them out on making it up or getting it wrong. When the Chunin went back to their posts along the walls, there was only a fourth of the original amount of teams.

The Proctor grinned savagely. "Well, that cut the number down significantly. You all pass!"

Cheers erupted for a moment, and Team Seven sighed collectively in relief.

"QUIET!"

Silence fell.

The proctor took a deep, calming breath before continuing. "Do any of you understand the point of this test?"

An Iwa Genin raised his hand. "To prove that we had the skills to gather information subtly?"

"Correct. The next test is at Training Ground four-four, also known as the Killer Mountain. Be there eight o'clock sharp tonight. For you foreign Genin, the code you just decoded are the directions. I'd suggest taking a nap. You'll need it."

Sasuke walked over to the shelf Kitty had perched on, and coaxed her into jumping down into his hands before leading Sakura and Fox out of the building.

"That was actually very simple." Fox said.

"Yeah, I'm surprised." Sakura replied. "I heard that it was an information gathering test as part one, but I heard that it was crazy hard. It was just a code, and a super simple one at that. Not to mention that getting the missing parts was like taking a kunai from a civilian."

"You passed!"

Fox and Sakura shrieked in chorus, while Sasuke merely nodded in greeting.

"You know where to go?" Kakashi asked, ignoring Sakura and Fox.

Sasuke replied in kind. "Yes. We don't have to be there until eight, so I was going to find somewhere to eat."

Sakura had calmed by then, and glaring at Kakashi, added, "I think we should eat also, then find this training ground and take a nap outside of it. It's only noon, so we could get a good eight hours of sleep in. especially since the name of this training ground is the Killer Mountain."

Kakashi tilted his head to the side. "Has Anko ever brought you into the Forest of Death?"

"Yeah." Sakura answered easily. "Why do you ask?"

"I've just heard that the Killer Mountain is like the Forest of Death. I think you all will do just fine."

Fox's mechanical voice box crackled. "Are you kidding me? It's got 'Killer' in the name! You sure we're gonna be okay, Kakashi-sensei?"

He waved his hand lazily at Naruto's concerns. "You're pretty strong Genin. I think you'll be fine."

.

.

.

Sasuke woke to the sound of a camera snapping.

"Hey, look. One of them is up." A voice that he recognized as Kankuro from the Sand team, said.

Sasuke sat up, and he heard Kankuro shout in surprise and fall backwards.

"Whazz' goin' on, huh?" Fox asked, yawning.

Kankuro grumbled. "It's creepy how well you can imitate a fox, monster. Anyway, I came to wake you guys up. Its seven thirty and the other teams are starting to arrive. I don't want my only competition kicked out because his team didn't wake up in time."

"Oh, shit!"

Fox stood slowly, allowing Sasuke to catch Sakura before she fell to the ground.

Sakura awoke to the feeling of a hateful stare at the back of her head, and the feeling of being held. She could see Ino from the corner of her eye, and decided to screw with her fellow kunoichi, just because Ino annoyed her and she was in a mood to play around.

"Oh, Sasuke-kun!" Sakura moaned.

Sasuke froze in terror.

Sakura turned her head into his chest, and murmured, "Play along, idiot, I want to piss off Ino."

Sasuke relaxed a little, but was still uncomfortable while Sakura stretched and put her arm around his neck. "Sakura, I don't understand."

"Ino annoys me, and I want to piss her off. She's the leader of your fan club back home." She started talking louder, "oh, Sasuke-kun!"

"Yes, well, if you're satisfied, could you get off of me?"

Sakura stood abruptly, and pecked him on the cheek, relishing in the sound of Ino shrieking angrily and tearing er hair out. "Sure."

Naruto tried to wolf-whistle, but Fox's voice box didn't translate it as much more than a high-pitched, airy, wind blowing sound.

"I heard that." Sakura growled dangerously.

Fox sat up ramrod straight, playing innocent.

Sakura glared at her, but before she could start chewing him out, an even louder and longer whistle pierced the air, stunning the Genin into silence.

When it stopped, a figure in front of a huge gate coughed. "Now that I have your attention…"

Deidara straightened. "This is the Killer Mountain. At the top, there is a building. Your first goal is to get there with all three members of your team alive and in fighting condition. Your second goal is to get the other half of a sphere."

The blonde held up two half-spheres. The jagged edges on one matched up to the other.

"Luckily for you, all the black halves match up to all the white halves. You have seven days. When you're ready, come up and sign a waiver that says I am in no way, shape, or form responsible for any deaths of injuries, and you can trade that in for half a sphere. Once you have a half sphere, you'll be escorted to a gate, and they'll open at nine o'clock, stay open for ten minutes, then close for seven days."

He looked at the nervous faces of the Genin and grinned. "Good luck."

Sakura dragged Sasuke and Fox to the tent where they got the waivers and traded them in for half spheres.

Naruto waited until he was sure nobody could see him before opening the hatch on Fox's back to sign his name on a waiver, and handed it to Sakura. Sasuke handed his to Sakura also, and she handed all three to the waiting Chunin, who was staring at Naruto in awe.

"Oh, man, are you Leaf's Puppeteer?" he asked, taking their waivers, "you kicked Kokoro's ass a few years back! I've never seen him so angry! Can I shake your hand?"

Naruto, in mild shock, agreed, and the Chunin shook Naruto's hand rigorously. "Man, I can't wait to see Kokoro's face when I tell him I met you. He's gonna be so pissed, and I'm going to laugh so hard! Oh, here's your half-sphere, good luck!"

Naruto slunk back down into Fox's belly and shut the latch.

While they were being escorted to a gate, Naruto finally spoke up. "I have no idea what just happened."

.

.

.

'Converging on a team. Cherry, can you tell which sphere they have?'

'It's got three spikes instead of five, it's white.'

'Damn. Moving on. Fox-boy, do you have a location on another team?'

"Yeah, about two clicks northeast."

Sasuke was grateful that Naruto still had their headsets stored away in his giant scroll, because while he and Sakura could sign, Fox couldn't. Naruto, however, could put on a headset and turn off Fox's voice box.

'Let's move.'

Three bodies moved silently through the treetops.

'It's black!' Sakura signed frantically, 'what's our plan?'

Sasuke took a moment to answer. 'They're tired, and it's nearly midnight. They appear to have already been fighting, and one's injured. Let's wait for them to settle down for the night, then I want Fox-boy to stick them with paralytic senbon.'

"You got it, Sasuke."

When the Sound team found a relatively hallowed out tree trunk, they curled up together, protecting Kin, because they couldn't pass without her. It was her own damn fault she got hurt, though, and they didn't really care if she died or not.

Zaku fell asleep, and Dosu stayed awake to watch for enemies.

Fox's jaw clicked open quietly, and a slew of Senbon sunk into the Sound Genin's skin and the ground surrounding them.

Instantly, Dosu was frozen and unable to move even his mouth.

"Holy hell, Naruto. What the fuck did you put on those senbon?" Sakura asked, audibly impressed.

"A crazy concoction with about thirty-five ingredients. Don't worry you three, it'll wear off in couple of days. I think." Naruto said comfortingly, "Got their half-sphere, Sakura?"

"Yep. And… Black! We're golden, boys!" Sakura crowed. "Let's make our way to that building. I don't want to be on this stupid mountain any longer than necessary."

Fox leaned down, "hop on Fox's back, Sakura. We'll move faster like this."

"You're sure? On the way here you walked awfully slowly." Sakura replied skeptically.

Fox nodded, "I'm sure! It's not that hard, I just had to get used to it!"

Sakura shrugged and swung her leg over Fox's back and grabbed the fur on her neck. Simultaneously, Sasuke and Fox shot off, and Sakura clutched at the fur she had in her hands, cursing Naruto for not warning her while Kitty relaxed in Sasuke's arms, being completely used to the insane speed he used.

Dosu could only think, 'Orochimaru-sama's going to kill us.'

Naruto and Sasuke flew through the trees, racing against each other and stepping down onto rocky ground when the trees ran out, and there was just a steep hill of rock and sparse grass. They dodged the occasional demonic-looking goat, and when they finally reached the doors of the building, Naruto let Sakura down.

Sakura slid off Fox's back stiffly, trying to pat down her wind-blown hair, and failing. Miserably.

"You are such an ass, Naruto. Why didn't you warn me you could go that fast!?" she snapped, digging in her bag for a hairbrush to fix her long hair with.

Fox flattened her ears a little. "But I did warn you, Sakura. I told you I figured it out!"

Sasuke put a hand on Fox's shoulder. "Don't argue, Naruto. You will lose this argument."

Naruto grumbled, but apologized.

Sakura huffed and stalked through the double doors, breaking a seal keeping them closed at the same time.

Kakashi was standing in the room they entered.

"Congrats, my- Genin. You passed part two!" he praised, "Now you just have to wait six days for the test to end."

Sakura glared at him. "We better are getting this on the record."

Kakashi held up his hands to placate her. "Don't worry, it is. By the way, the Sand Team is here."

And with that, their teacher used a Body Flicker to escape.

"That bastard." Naruto grumbled, climbing out of Fox and sealing her away. "You guys want to explore with me?"

Sasuke shrugged, and Sakura muttered, "why not?", and both followed after their blonde teammate.

.

.

.

Deidara looked at the four teams skeptically.

"Only four teams made it through? Two of which are rookies from Konoha? Sand's only team and only one of our teams?" he snorted, shaking his head sadly. "Wow. Well, that means we don't have to do any prelims, so come up and get a number, yeah?"

Each one of the Genin took a card with a number.

"Okay, so it looks like it's gonna be Temari versus Emi."

A slim girl with an Iwa headband grinned, apparently thinking Temari would be an easy opponent. Temari gave the little girl a quick once over and bit down on a smirk.

"Sakura versus Ino."

Sakura lit up. That was the equivalent of a free pass!

"Taki versus Kankuro."

Taki was the male from the Iwa team, and eyeballed Kankuro nervously.

"Sasuke versus Shikamaru."

Shikamaru groaned dramatically. He knew that his fight was going to take forever.

"Choji versus Aoi."

Aoi was the other girl from Iwa, and looked apprehensive.

"And Naruto versus Gaara." Deidara finished. "And it's not a tournament style. You only have to worry about one fight. It would take too long otherwise. You have two weeks to prepare. Sorry that it's not the usual month, but the Iwa council doesn't like having a bunch of ninja from other Villages, especially well-known ones, in Iwagakure for too long."

.

.

.

"So, what are we gonna do for two weeks?" Naruto asked.

Sakura shrugged. "I'm all set to kick Ino's ass. Maybe we can touch up my taijutsu?"

"Aiko-sensei told me she was going to give Kakashi a scroll for me and if I passed the first two parts of the Chunin exam, he'd give it to me and I could teach Kitty a jutsu." Sasuke added. "So there's that."

Naruto groaned. "Man, I don't want to fight Gaara. Kankuro said he's a crazy bastard."

"After being friends with Shikamaru and Choji for five years, I think he'd probably be a little more laid back." Sakura replied with an amused expression. "What do you have to be worried about, anyway?"

Kakashi interrupted their conversation by walking into their spacious hotel room. He sat backwards in a chair and slumped over the back, and seemed a little depressed, like someone had drowned one of his ninken, and or like he had just been restricted to D-Ranks for a year.

"Naruto. I need to talk to you." he said quietly. "It's uh, it's about your match up with Gaara."

Setting down his tools, Naruto turned around to face Kakashi. "Yeah, sensei? What about it?"

"I need to talk to you." the Jonin repeated, "in private."

"Kakashi-sensei, if it involves Naruto, it involves all of us." Sasuke said shortly, when he saw Naruto hesitate nervously.

Sakura and Naruto agreed.

Kakashi paused, and examined each of them in turn, before sighing and sitting down.

"What I am about to tell you is a double S-Rank village secret, understand? You do not tell it to anyone who doesn't already know, you don't even mention the existence of the secret to anyone who doesn't already know, and you have to promise me one more thing on top of all of that." Kakashi explained, with the most serious look Team Seven had ever seen on his face.

Team Seven listened intently.

"You have to promise me that, even after hearing about this, you won't think badly of Naruto."

Sasuke replied in the way only Uchiha and Aburame could, "Naruto is an excellent ninja. Why would we, as his teammates, ever think badly of him?"

"Yeah, Kakashi-sensei. Naruto's Naruto." Sakura chimed in.

Naruto just stared worriedly at Kakashi.

Kakashi let out a sigh of annoyance. "Alright. The double S-Ranked secret is that Naruto is a Jinchuriki."

Sakura blinked. "That's it? Well here I thought you were gonna tell us that Naruto is really the son of the Fourth Hokage or something. Hell, even that might not have surprised me. He is blonde, and he does look an awful lot like the Fourth on the Mountain…"

Kakashi gawked. "You knew?"

Sakura scoffed. "Duh. What, you think a simple law is gonna keep people quiet? No, it's not."

"What's a Jinchuriki?" Naruto asked in the silence that followed after Sakura's admission.

Sakura readied herself to launch into a complicated explanation, but Sasuke beat her to it.

"You have a demon sealed in your body."

"I HAVE A WHAT SEALED IN ME?"

"Shhhhh!" Sakura hissed, slapping a hand over his mouth, "are you stupid!? Don't talk so loudly you idiot! It's not that big of a deal anyway! So what, you've got a giant chakra fox sealed in you, what are you gonna do? Go cry? There ain't shit you can do, so suck it up and learn how to use the power given to you!"

"Also," Sasuke added, "If it ever gets to be an issue, I read in the Uchiha Archives that the Sharingan can hypnotize tailed beasts."

"But you don't have your Sharingan yet, asshole!"

Sasuke shrugged. "Minor detail."

Kakashi laughed breathlessly. Team Seven thought it odd to hear their teacher show so much emotion, and stared at him in worry.

"You guys really don't care," he laughed, "that Naruto is the container of the nine tailed fox?"

Sasuke snorted. "No."

Sakura scoffed. "Psh. Like hell."

"well," Kakashi said, pushing his chair onto its back legs and leaning back, "looks like our goals for the next two weeks are to get Sasuke his Sharingan, work on Sakura's taijutsu, and see if we can't get Naruto capable of using the nine tail's chakra."

.

.

.

By the day of the third test, Team Seven had learned three things.

One: Sharingan is insane.

Two: Sakura can pack a punch.

Three: the Kyuubi's chakra fucked up Naruto's control.

Sasuke was struggling with the literally perfect memory he had when he had the Sharingan activated, for a week and a half. He also learned that hypnotizing is a lot more difficult than it sounds, and requires a lot more than just a vague idea to work.

Sakura spent the same amount of time beating Sasuke into a pulp until his Sharingan activated. Once she learned about how Tsunade of the Sanin enhanced her punches with Chakra to the point of being able to level a mountain, her goal became something along the lines of kicking Tsunade's ass.

Naruto, meanwhile, spent the week and a half glaring at Kakashi after Naruto used the Kyuubi's chakra for the first time, and also spent that time madly trying to get his chakra control up to where he was used to it being. He spent every waking hour running multiple chakra control exercises at one, and never let up the glare he fixed Kakashi with.

"I could kill him." Naruto growled. "My chakra control still isn't up to where I want it to be!"

Sasuke grunted in reply.

"I'm pretty okay with how the past two weeks turned out." Sakura replied serenely, half-skipping.

"… I think I still have a bruise on my back from the last 'spar' we had." Sasuke grumbled.

"Oh quit whining, Sourpuss."

Naruto spluttered, and Sasuke scowled darkly at Sakura. "I thought you had forgotten about that."

Sakura beamed. "Oh no. I'm never going to forget that."

"Yeah, it was pretty brilliant of me, wasn't it?" Naruto said, grinning. "You should have seen your- what in the hells is that?"

Sakura and Sasuke looked to where Naruto was pointing. Above the arena where the third test was going to take place at, they could see what looked like a blue bubble that only encompassed the arena, and not the seats.

"Oh my god." Sakura breathed in awe, "that's a chakra barrier. Wow, I wonder if they've got a team holding it up, or if they charged seals or what? That's pretty bad ass."

"Chakra barrier? Is that what it sounds like?"

"A barrier made of chakra. Nothing can penetrate it, but the creator or creators can make gaps, or allow certain types of things through or make it one way. If they've got a team holding that sucker up, they'll need at least four shinobi with off the charts amounts of chakra, like you, Naruto, plus the coordination to stay in sync with each other." Sakura explained.

"So… yes, huh?"

Sakura gave up. "Yeah."

"Hurry up. We don't need to pick up Kakashi-sensei's bad habits." Sasuke called over his shoulder.

Naruto yelped, and grabbed both Sakura and Sasuke's shirtsleeves and trying to drag them while he ran. He still didn't have any strength, which irritated Sasuke to no end, but his teammates allowed themselves to be 'dragged' towards the stadium.

"God damn it, that man is not going to make me make people wait!" Naruto snarled.

"Naruto, you're the last match anyway! You don't need to be worried!" Sakura complained.

"But you're the second match! Do you want Ino to win on technicality, huh?"

Sakura huffed, but started running to match his pace.

They made it to the competitors' box just before the proctor called the first match.

"Cutting it close, forehead. Picking up your teacher's habit towards lateness?" Ino taunted.

Sakura got that look on her face that Naruto and Sasuke had come to recognize as her, 'I'm totally about to prank you' expression. "Yeah, well, see, Kitty was being chased by this dog, and then we had to take the dog to the vet after she ripped his face open with her claws."

Naruto whined wordlessly, but didn't argue, and Kitty licked her paws for effect.

Ino sneered, but turned away from them.

"Man," Naruto groaned, "I still really, really don't want to fight Gaara."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "If you have to, use That Chakra."

Neither of her teammates saw her pinch the bridge of her nose in annoyance. While they continued to argue on the cost-benefit ratio, she muttered to herself, "one of these days I will break Sasuke of that stupid habit, I swear to god…"

They stopped arguing to hiss in sympathy when Temari nearly broke Emi, the girl from Stone, in two.

"Winner, Temari!"

Temari basked in the cheers and whistles for a moment before sauntering on up to the stands to go sit with her father, the Kazekage.

"Next Match! Sakura Haruno of Leaf versus Ino Yamanaka of Leaf!"

Sakura didn't bother with the stairs and just leapt over the railing from the competitors' box and through the chakra shield. Ino scowled, but took the long way, to the disapproval of the crowd, who screamed and booed at her.

"Begin!"

Naruto nudged Sasuke. "Ten bucks she uses Angel's Love."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "Five she uses Demon's Terror."

They turned their attention to the arena, waiting for a sign that a genjutsu had kicked in.

Suddenly, Ino swooned, staring dreamily into space. "Oh, Sasuke-kun!"

Sasuke scowled, but handed Naruto ten dollars. "Damn."

Naruto grinned. "What'd I tell you, huh? Never bet against me. You'll always lose."

Sakura circled Ino for a moment, to the approval of the crowd. She grinned, and tilted her head teasingly, and suddenly, Ino froze, her eyes grew wide, and she sucked in a single terrified breath before letting it out in a piercing scream.

Sasuke glared at Naruto. "She used it."

Naruto scowled, but handed Sasuke five dollars. "I swear she did that on purpose."

Sasuke grunted.

Ino seemed to finally realize she was in a genjutsu, and released it. She was angry, but obviously shaken by whatever she had seen. Her hands trembled and her face was ashen, but she turned a fierce glare on Sakura and snarled, launching herself at her like a mad dog.

Sakura went on the defensive blocking and dodging Ino's wide swings, until an opportunity opened to get a one-hit knock out on the other girl.

One of Ino's swings went a little too wide, and Sakura's fist flicked out and socked the (not blonde at the moment) girl in the ear. Ino collapsed, and Sakura waited while a medic checked Ino's pulse and called the match.

"Ino Yamanaka is alive, but unable to continue! Sakura Haruno is the victor!"

Sakura threw her hands above her head, panting a little, but grinning like a madwoman. The crowd let out a pleased, deafening roar; obviously they liked a good catfight as much as the next crowd, and the two girls provided it.

"Day-yum, Sakura!" Naruto whistled quietly. "That was pretty bad ass."

Sakura flipped her long, pink hair over her shoulder. "I said I'd kick her ass easily. And by the way, the next time you two bet on me, I'm going to kick both your asses."

They both paled a little, but agreed immediately.

When Sakura was distracted by the next match, Naruto muttered to Sasuke, "I told you she did it on purpose…"

Sasuke grunted.

.

.

.

After Kankuro was just barely beaten by Taki (Taki used an illusion to make Kankuro think he was somewhere he wasn't, and managed to get up close with him to fight hand to hand, which Kankuro is terrible at), Sasuke and Shikamaru were called down.

On the way down, Shikamaru groaned. "This isn't going to be fun."

Sasuke grunted in agreement.

"Don't talk much, do you?"

Sasuke grunted again. Kitty meowed.

"You'd be pretty mad if I forfeited, wouldn't you?"

"Yes."

Shikamaru nodded regretfully. "Damn. And Ino would kill me if I didn't fight, so… we're at an impasse."

Sasuke said nothing.

They reached the bottom at that point, and all Shikamaru could do was sigh. "How troublesome."

In the arena, the two faced off quietly for a moment, waiting patiently for the proctor to begin the match. Sasuke and Shikamaru both looked unreasonably relaxed, when really, neither were at all. Sasuke was tensed and ready to flee into one of the few trees, and Shikamaru was preparing to use his clan's technique.

"Begin!"

Shikamaru slammed his hands together and shouted, "Shadow Possession Jutsu!"

Sasuke used an impossibly fast Body Flicker to disappear before Shikamaru's shadow could reach his.

Shikamaru groaned, and let his shadow return to his feet. "What a drag. Should I wait for you to come to me, or should I go to you?"

There was no response.

Shikamaru crouched down and put the tips of his fingers together in a steeple formation.

Up in the stands, Choji hummed excitedly.

"What're you all excited about, Akimichi?" Sakura asked, watching him warily.

Choji chomped down on a chip, smiling. "Shikamaru's getting serious off the bat. He must think Sasuke's a challenging opponent."

Naruto laughed loudly. "Of course he is! He'll be the last thing Shikamaru never saw!"

Sakura snorted. "That was the stupidest most accurate thing I've heard you say, I think."

"But it's true, isn't it, huh?" Naruto grinned. "Ten bucks he has Kitty distract Shikamaru and knocks him out from behind, Sakura."

Sakura returned the grin. "Five he tries to roast him. He's got an obsession with that fireball jutsu."

"You're on!"

Down in the arena, Shikamaru stood finally.

"I bet your brother didn't take even this long."

Naruto and Sakura froze, and as one, said, "Oh shit."

"What? I didn't know Sasuke had a brother!" Choji exclaimed.

Sakura ignored him.

Naruto didn't take his eyes off of Shikamaru in case he had to stop Sasuke from murdering their fellow Genin, but replied, "His older brother killed the Uchiha clan."

"Oh."

Sasuke didn't try to murder Shikamaru, but neither of his teammates let their guards down.

Shikamaru continued, "Yeah, I heard from my dad that Itachi, that's his name, right? That Itachi beat his opponent in less than a second. You're kinda slacking, Sasuke. Your brother might be a psychopath, but he's a damn good ninja."

Sakura winced. "Man, Shikamaru's gonna get himself killed talking like that. Usually Sasuke would have already attacked. What's he waiting for?"

"Don't you two know what Shikamaru's doing?" Choji asked.

"Nu-huh."

"No, what?"

"He's purposely baiting Sasuke, if his brother really is that touchy of a subject."

Sakura groaned and slapped her forehead. "Duh, I get it! Sasuke's doing his damnedest to not react and not give himself away!"

"And hey, maybe he only left you alive because he thought you were weak? I heard he even killed infants, so does that mean you're weaker than a baby, Sasuke?" Shikamaru taunted, "Perhaps you should just quit, Sasuke? I mean, if you really are that weak st-"

He was cut off when Kitty latched onto his face.

Naruto and Sakura hissed in sympathy. Kitty had extremely sharp claws.

The last thing Shikamaru saw was the dark grey belly of an angry cat before he was violently stabbed in a pressure point with a senbon that made him collapse, soundly asleep and mostly unharmed, except for the cat claw gouges on his face.

Sasuke had an angry expression, and looked like he was about to slice Shikamaru's throat wide open.

"Hey, chill out, sourpuss!" Naruto shouted. "You can get back at him later! Don't you know what Kakashi-sensei will do to you if you kill him, huh?"

Sasuke's glare was relocated to Naruto, but he huffed and turned away, waiting for the medic to call the match.

"Shikamaru is alive, but unable to continue! Sasuke Uchiha wins the match!"

The crowd screamed again. Naruto thought that maybe people liked seeing people get revenge.

Sasuke, when he returned to them, was stiff, and obviously very, very angry.

Naruto touched his shoulder gently. "Hey, man. He was just trying to get a rise out of you. You can get payback later, huh? I'll even help. I've got a fuck ton of glitter we can cover his stuff in, and it's damn near impossible to get glitter out of anything."

Sasuke relaxed a little. "Sure."

Kitty started purring.

.

.

.

Naruto whined in terror when his match was called.

"Sasuke, can I just forfeit?" he asked pitifully.

Sasuke glared at him. "No. remember what I said earlier."

Naruto kicked the ground, throwing a little tantrum. "I don't want to! That chakra kills my control!"

Sakura rolled her eyes and shoved Naruto off the railing. "Oh, quit being a baby and go kick his ass!"

Sasuke gave her a disappointed look.

"What? He'll be fine."

Naruto landed clumsily, and flicked Sakura off.

Gaara was already down in the arena, and tilted his head to the side. He was watching Naruto curiously.

"What's your issue, huh?" Naruto asked, using his usual defense mechanism of acting like he wasn't frightened when he was petrified. Also, he would later blame the adrenaline from falling down into the arena on his cockiness.

"Mother says you are like me."

"Mother?" Naruto replied, "What do you mean by…?"

Naruto's eyes widened. "Oh, no no no, that thing isn't you mother!"

The proctor interrupted before he could continue. "Are you two ready?"

"Yes."

"I, uh, I guess."

The proctor shrugged. "Alright. Begin!"

Neither moved.

"I think I'll let you live, since mother says you are like me."

Naruto barked out a sarcastic laugh, stalling while he retrieved a scroll from his small side bag. "Sure, that's great. Think that monster is you mom, cause that's a good idea!"

Gaara stared at him. "I don't understand. Don't you hear your mother?"

"No, cause I don't know who she is! And my, ah, my prisoner? Definitely not her!"

Gaara attacked before Naruto could take Fox out of her scroll, and he danced out of the way of the tentacle of sand that lashed out towards him. "Don't believe me, huh? You should, cause it's the truth!"

"Mother wants to see the one you call your prisoner." Gaara said, calmly ignoring Naruto.

Naruto, still dodging the tendrils of sand, shouted, "hell no! He fucked my chakra control up the last time I used his chakra! And I am not letting that bastard out, ever!"

Gaara growled. "Fight me with his gift to you!"

"Gift? What gift? He's cursed me, not gifted me!"

Gaara's eyes narrowed. "Liar."

"_You are lying, though you don't know it."_

Naruto yelped in panic.

"_Oh, quit being dramatic, you little brat."_

"_How are you talking to me!? You're supposed to be sealed up nice and tight!"_

"_Slipped some chakra through. Your gift is instant healing, stupid human!"_

Gaara caught Naruto's left leg from his knee down with his sand, and squeezed.

'_I should clarify…"_

Naruto screamed in agony.

"_That the instant healing only works when all of your bits are still attached. I can't regrow limbs."_

Naruto stared in horror and shock at the stump where his leg used to be.

Gritting his teeth through the pain, he brought fox from her scroll, and attacked Gaara directly. "YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THAT!"

Up in the stands, Sakura was horrified. "Naruto!"

Sasuke was instantly worried. "Cauterize it, Naruto!"

Shikamaru and Choji traded terrified looks.

"Shikamaru, what happened to him?" Choji whispered.

"I don't know. You know Gaara!" Shikamaru replied with a rare show of emotion other than boredom, "Either Sand fucked him up or something about Naruto made him want to take him seriously enough to critically injure him…"

"Naruto, you crazy moron, what are you doing!?" Sakura shouted. "Forfeit! You need a medic, you stupid fucking goddamn idiot!"

"He's going to torch him." Sasuke replied, letting out a bark of hysteric (for him) laughter.

Fox, indeed, did belch out a lick of white flame before engulfing Gaara in it. When the flames receded, he was encased in a glass sphere. He stared at the glass in confusion, and touched it gently with one hand.

"What…?"

Naruto panted, but grinned through the agonizing pain. "Don't you know? Sand turns to glass at high temperatures."

Fox smashed through the glass, and sank her poisoned teeth into the other Jinchuriki's shoulder, and thrashed her head back and forth to rip his shoulder open. She only succeeded in making a few puncture wounds, but Naruto had mixed a special poison that would take down even a Jinchuriki.

Gaara swooned after a second of staring at the slightly bleeding marks. "What is this…?"

"P-poison. It'll knock you out for a few days, but it won't kill you, sadly." Naruto fell to the side, and let out a whine of pain, but fought to stay awake. "I wish I had made it stronger, because you really, really" gasp "deserve it!"

Naruto's body betrayed him, and when he opened his eyes again, he wasn't in the arena.

.

.

.

"Sakura, get a nurse."

"Is he waking up!?"

"Get a nurse, Sakura."

Naruto tried to sit up, but a familiar hand gently pushed him back down.

"What's going on?" he tried to ask, but his words were slurred, so it sounded more like, "wha's go'n on?"

Soft fur brushed up against his cheek, and his hand reached up to pet Kitty.

"You're lucky that Kakashi-sensei called the match when you passed out." Sasuke said calmly. "You were seconds from bleeding out completely."

"Oh."

"Also, your leg from the knee down is gone."

"Gone?"

"As in, not attached to your body."

Naruto opened his eyes finally, and struggled to sit up.

"No, Naruto." Sasuke admonished. "Wait for a nurse."

"But I wanna see!" Naruto whined. He was aware that he was likely on a massive amount of painkillers, but that didn't stop him. "Please, Sourpuss?"

Sasuke's eyebrow twitched, but he sighed, and ever so gently helped him sit up. "If I get in trouble for this, I'm kicking your ass when you're better, got that?"

"Yeah, yeah." Naruto said, tossing his cover to the foot of the bed.

He was in boxers, and his left leg was missing from the knee down. The knee was bandaged neatly, and his other foot had a sock on.

Naruto started laughing brokenly. "Holy shit."

"He's awake? He was supposed to sleep for another twelve hours!" an unfamiliar, feminine voice exclaimed.

Sakura's voice replied, "He's got a crazy metabolism, we would have been more worried if he woke up when he was supposed to."

A nurse and Sakura entered the room.

"Good lord, he is awake!" the nurse bustled past Sakura, and glared at Sasuke until he leaned away from Naruto and held his hands up in innocence.

Naruto grabbed the nurse's arm, wide-eyed in terror, and asked, "I can still be a ninja, right?"

She pried it off. "I've seen plenty of dismembered shinobi, kid. I hear you use puppetry, right? Why don't you make use that to make a prosthetic? Now, hold still and let me make sure you're not going to bleed to death. And if I were you, I wouldn't look when I change this bandage just yet. It's pretty ugly."

Naruto didn't listen, and promptly puked into the trashcan Sasuke offered.

.

.

.

Fox was, luckily, not ruined at all. Naruto only had to clean the joints out of sand and con Sasuke into shaking her pelt out of sand outside, since he wasn't allowed to leave his bed for three days, even though he knew he could roll a wheelchair around.

"Please, c'mon!" Naruto whined, "I can travel! I wouldn't be walking either way! I can just ride Foxy-chan!"

The nurse scowled, but gave in with a heavy, tired sigh. "I did manage to keep a damn stubborn shinobi here this long, at least. I suppose I can't protest, since you are fine, aside from missing half your leg."

"Yes!" Naruto cheered, "I'm out of here! Sasuke, help me outside!"

Sasuke grumbled. "Why always me? Sakura's stronger."

"Cause it'd be weird, and she'd totally hit a cripple." Naruto replied, cheerfully slinging an arm over Sasuke's shoulder.

"True," Sasuke grunted, walking to Naruto's wheelchair at the same excruciatingly slow pace Naruto was hopping to it (literally). "Or at least, she'd hit you, even with you being a cripple."

"Jerk."

Sasuke dropped Naruto into the wheelchair. "Idiot."

They bickered all the way to the front desk, where Naruto stopped long enough to sign himself out, and continued outside.

Sakura met them outside. "Alright boys, Kakashi-sensei said to meet at the gate at nine, so let's get moving."

Naruto glanced at the sun while he was switching out his wheelchair for Fox. "But it's like, eleven thirty."

"Which is Kakashi-time for eight thirty." She said slowly, mocking him. "Let's go."

Naruto and Sasuke shrugged, but followed Sakura to the gate.

Kakashi appeared in half an hour and the four of them started their journey back home, to Konohagakure.

.

.

.

END CHAPTER FOUR

7488


	6. The Invasion of Konoha

**Apologies for how short this one is. I really just wanted to get this out of the way, so I could move on…**

**.**

**.**

**.**

The Hokage took a slow puff from his pipe while he read the recommendations for the Genin that had gone to Iwa for the Chunin exams. He had watched the fights the night before, and was impressed with all of them.

The Genin who had made it to the third round were nervously, anxiously, and patiently waiting for his decision.

"Iruka, would you kindly fetch me four Chunin vests?" the Hokage asked a secretary Chunin to his left.

The six shinobi traded nervous glances.

Naruto thought he wasn't going to make Chunin because his leg was ripped off. Sasuke thought he wasn't going to make Chunin because he lost control of his emotions. Sakura thought she wasn't going to make Chunin because she had sent a comrade to the medics.

Shikamaru thought he wouldn't make Chunin because Sasuke trounced him so completely. Ino thought she wouldn't make Chunin because Sakura kicked her ass so badly. Choji thought he wouldn't make Chunin because his fight wasn't showy enough.

"Ah, thank you, Iruka." The Hokage said, bringing their attention back to him. "I have decided to promote four of you. Two of you are not being promoted, simply because I believe you need a little more experience before you can be promoted."

"Shikamaru. You showed a very good knowledge of tactics, and you obviously know how to play your opponent to your benefit. You also, however, underestimated how your opponent would react to your taunting. But, due to the recommendations of several shinobi, including an Iwa shinobi, I am promoting you. Congratulations."

Shikamaru was stunned, but took the offered vest.

"Choji. You showed that you can fight and that you can win, but due to several recommendations, I am not promoting you. You need more experience before you make Chunin."

Choji nodded. He was expecting that.

"Ino, I'm afraid that applies to you, also."

Ino slumped in disappointment.

Sakura elbowed Sasuke in excitement. He bumped his shoulder against hers in acknowledgement, and growled to make her stop stabbing him with her sharp elbows.

"Team Seven, the three of you showed that you had both the skills and determination to complete any mission. Sakura, you beat Ino in an incredibly clever way, which surprised all of the judges, showing your intelligence. Sasuke, you showed an incredible amount of control when Shikamaru was taunting you. And Naruto…"

The Hokage chuckled. "You proved that even with a deadly injury, you have the determination to fight to the death. However, next time, you might want to cauterize a wound like that before you continue fighting or you'll bleed out."

Naruto shrank a little in embarrassment.

"Congratulations you all-"

The ground shook, and everyone reached out to steady themselves against each other and the walls.

A Chunin appeared on the Hokage's windowsill, panting for breath. "Hokage-sama! There's a giant snake attacking the gate, and there's a couple hundred Sound shinobi attacking! We've started evacuating civvies, but there's been fatalities already! The Jonin have initiated invasion protocol, do you have any additional orders?"

"What? Quick- Ino and Choji, go help evacuate civilians! You four, put these on quickly! Shikamaru, go find a thinly defended area and defend it! Naruto, I want you to go help kill the giant snake! Sakura, Sasuke, back him up! Go!"

Shikamaru and Team Seven yanked on their vests, Naruto discarding his orange jacket, and rushed off to obey.

"Holy shit! That's definitely a giant snake!" Naruto shouted from Fox's back when he saw the giant, purple snake.

"Ibiki-sempai! The Hokage sent us to help kill this thing!" Sakura shouted, landing next to the interrogator. "What are your orders?"

He glanced at her, took in her Chunin jacket, and said, "congrats on the promotion, Sakura. Can you drop a Demon's Terror big enough to affect this thing?"

"Yessir!" Sakura answered, and started preparing one of her two signature genjutsu.

"Great!" Ibiki grimaced. "Can both of you two boys do fire jutsu? We're going to roast this thing!"

"Yessir!"

Sasuke used his Great Fireball technique, and Naruto quickly climbed into Fox and ran towards the giant snake with her Flamethrower activated.

The giant snake screamed, and immediately, everyone knew that Sakura's genjutsu was up.

"More fire!" Ibiki shouted. "I want this thing to be ashes! Don't worry about any buildings!"

Several more fireballs and jets of flame were aimed at the giant snake, and the stench of burning flesh filled the immediate area.

The snake thrashed about a few more times, crumbling buildings, and catching them on fire with each toss of its body, before collapsing. The ground shook as if a minor earthquake had appeared from nowhere, and one particularly unstable building collapsed.

"Great job everyone! Any fatalities?"

There were several responses all at once.

"All good over this way!"

"Headcount! One, two, three, four… we're missing one!"

"We've got a pair of civvies dead over here!"

Ibiki cursed. "Alright, if you're out of chakra, move the bodies! If there's anyone under the snake, it's gonna have to wait! If you're good to fight, stay with your team or partner and find somewhere to put your skills to use!"

Sasuke, now that there was a little bit of time, knocked on Fox's side. "Naruto, take Kitty."

Naruto opened the hatch, and Kitty jumped right in and curled up in the little free space available. "Where are we going now?"

"Sakura, take your team and see if you can't find any commanders! Bring any you find to HQ, doesn't matter if they're dead or not!" Ibiki ordered.

"Yes, sempai! Come on boys, let's go!"

Sasuke shrugged. "There's your answer."

The three Chunin leapt away, and almost immediately, they heard someone shouting orders to the Sound attackers.

Sasuke threw a handful of senbon, and several pierced the red-haired woman's back, one cutting clean through her spinal cord, paralyzing her from the waist down. She collapsed, and Sasuke darted in and threw her over his shoulder, ignoring her shouts of protest while he returned to his teammates.

"Naruto, paralytic?" he barked, tossing her in front of Fox.

Naruto didn't answer, but Fox's jaw clicked and the teeth with Naruto's special paralytic concoction snapped shut on the kunoichi's shoulder.

"Great job Sasuke. You know where HQ is?" Sakura asked over the noise of battles around them.

"No!"

Sakura cursed, "Shit. Alright, come on! Toss her onto Fox and let's go!"

Naruto winced when the woman jarred Fox's back enough to hit him on the top of his head. "Watch what you're doing, huh?"

"Oh, shut up, Naruto! This is a battle zone! HQ's this way, hurry up!" Sakura snapped.

Anko was defending the T&I HQ when they got there. She was surrounded by dead or mostly dead Sound shinobi, and was laughing excitedly while covered in their blood. Most Leaf shinobi were staying out of her way, because she really didn't differentiate between friend and foe.

"Oh, hey!" she chirped, slashing a throat when she spotted Team Seven. "Congrats on making Chunin, Sakura!"

"Thanks, Anko-nii-chan." A small smile flickered across Sakura's face. "Ibiki-sempai sent me and my team to get all the commanders we could and bring them to HQ dead or alive. This one's alive, where should I put her?"

Anko leered at the red-haired woman on Fox's back. "Eh, just dump her inside. I take it your puppeteer teammate paralyzed her? How long's that last?"

"Eight to twelve hours on a normal kunoichi this heavy." Naruto answered automatically. "Less if she's got a boosted immune system. But sourpuss here got her spinal cord, so you shouldn't have to worry too much about her either way."

"Sweet. Yeah, just drop her inside the door. Say, Sakura, you gonna join T&I now that you're a Chunin?"

Sakura shook her head. "I don't know yet! The Hokage gave us our vests right when the first earth shaking whatever happened! I'll make my mind up whenever it's back to normal!"

"Sweet! Alright, go on and get some more commanders like Ibiki told you to!" Anko ordered, cheerfully chasing after a terrified Sound shinobi. "Come back, babies! I'm not gonna hurt you! Not much, at least!"

Team Seven, by the time the battle was over and the sound shinobi had all been killed, captured, or forced to flee, had managed to get four commanders in total. Ibiki was very pleased with their work and promised that he was going to request they go into T&I as what he called 'Fetchers'. They promised to look into it.

Kakashi, when he found them, stopped and appraised them. "You three look terrible. Go find somewhere to go to bed. Sasuke, the Uchiha complex is still standing, why don't you take your teammates there?"

"No." Sakura snapped. "I gotta find my parents!"

Kakashi held up his hands. "Relax, Sakura. I just saw them. Your mum's in the hospital. Don't worry; she just has a couple of scratches from stray kunai. Your dad's with her."

Sakura sighed in relief. "Thank the gods. I still need to see them. You two want to come with me?"

"Why not?" Sasuke said, shrugging. "Might as well stick together in case of a second wave."

Naruto wasn't sure about meeting anyone's parents, but now that Sasuke had agreed, he couldn't say no. "Sure."

Sakura smiled tiredly at both of them thankfully. "Thanks guys. I know you're iffy about family, but my parents are pretty cool."

.

.

.

"Mum?"

"Sakura? Are you alright? You're not hurt are you? You are hurt, aren't you!? Why'd I ever let you become a shinobi?"

"Mum, mum, relax. I'm fine." Sakura assured her, ignoring the fact that she felt woozy and nauseated from chakra exhaustion and minor blood loss. "Anyway, I want you to meet my teammates that I conned into coming and visiting you with me."

Sasuke glared at her.

Naruto whined. "I knew it! I knew you had a secret motive, you evil, evil kunoichi!"

"Oh hush, Naruto." Sakura commanded, pleased with herself. "Get out of Fox and meet my freaking parents! Don't be rude!"

He grumbled, but obeyed. "Help me, sourpuss."

"No. you can do it yourself."

"Uh, I'm missing half my leg, remember? Kinda difficult to do! At least take Kitty, you asshole." Naruto growled, opening to hatch and handing the dark grey cat to Sasuke.

Sakura's mother gasped loudly.

"Sweetheart. Sweetie, calm down. It's normal for shinobi, remember?" Sakura's father said, attempting to placate the woman.

"Half your leg? What happened? Are you still on active duty? Are you still allowed to be on active duty? Oh, oh my lord!" Sakura's mother started fanning herself. "Oh my lord, you poor child! How old are you!?"

Naruto hesitated, but heaved himself up and scooted forward to sit between Fox's shoulder blades before closing the hatch again and reseating himself more comfortably. He glanced at Sakura's parents nervously, expecting for her mother's concern to turn into contempt.

"Oh, you poor child! When was the last time that bandage was changed? Is that your blood!?"

Naruto blinked and answered without thinking. "Not my blood, and I think I changed it this morning."

Sakura's father groaned. "Look, we're all tired, and it would be better if we didn't get your mother worked up, so why don't you three head on home and get some rest."

"We will once we make a quick stop." Sasuke assured him. "Come on you two."

Sakura and Naruto followed Sasuke's quick retreat from the hospital.

"Where do we have to stop, Sasuke?" Sakura asked tiredly. "I really, really want to sleep…"

"I'm going to let the relief workers house people in the West half of the Uchiha district." Sasuke replied. "I never use it, so someone might as well."

"That's… kind of you, Sasuke." Sakura yawned.

Naruto sighed. "Sakura, get up here and ride Fox. You look like death."

Sakura glared at him. "Like you look any better, peg leg."

"You're pale as a ghost and you look like you're going to fall over at any second." Naruto deadpanned. "I wasn't hurt at all because I was hiding in Fox, and Sasuke's got enough medical know how to fix up his own cuts. So don't argue and just get up here."

She grumbled a little more, but grabbed the fur on Fox's shoulder and hopped up behind Naruto.

Sasuke stopped walking. "You two wait here, this will only take a moment."

He disappeared into the building (which was amazingly intact; there were only a single wall missing form the third floor!) and reappeared a moment later.

"Hey, Sasuke, did you see anything about the Elm apartments?" Naruto asked.

"collapsed." he replied simply. "You can stay at my place for as long as you want, but you both are staying at my place for tonight."

Naruto grumbled and started complaining about his workbench being destroyed.

Kakashi watched them from the rooftops and smiled, thankful that Sasuke was finally opening up to his teammates.

"Perhaps this Team Seven _will_ stay together…"

.

.

.

The three of them stared at each other.

"Okay, how's this gonna work?" Naruto asked irritably. "And how on earth do you only have one bed in this huge entire place?"

Sasuke glared. "I donated the others. It's not like I need a hundred something beds."

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Well, it is a big bed. Why don't we just share it?"

"You sure, Sakura? I mean, I can always use Fox for a bed slash pillow…" Naruto protested. "It would be kind weird, wouldn't it…?"

Rolling her eyes, Sakura pushed on his chest gently.

Naruto flailed his arms, trying to catch his balance, failing, and finally fell back onto the bed.

"That was mean, Sakura!" he complained.

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Hush. Come on, Sasuke. It's your bed too."

Reluctantly, Sasuke climbed into the bed on the other side of Naruto, with his back to them.

All three passed out almost instantly.

When they woke, there was some confusion.

Sakura was using Naruto's stomach as a pillow, Naruto had his good leg tangled with one of Sasuke's, Sasuke had one of his arms trapped under Naruto, and Kitty was laying on Sakura's shoulders, purring away.

"Um…"

"How in the hell…?"

"Ow."

"Shit, sorry Sasuke! Sakura, sit up so I can give Sasuke back his arm."

"If I wake Kitty up, she's going to claw me!"

"Ow!"

"Oh, uh… okay Sasuke, scoot back with me, Sakura, move to the mattress."

"Ouch!"

"Ah hah!"

Sasuke hissed and shook his arm out to get circulation flowing in his arm again.

Naruto rubbed the back of his head sheepishly and apologized again.

"It's… its fine." Sasuke muttered.

Sakura growled. "Someone get Kitty off of me so I can go to the bathroom!"

Sasuke leaned over Naruto and gently plucked Kitty off of Sakura's shoulders and relocated her to his lap.

Sakura immediately darted off to the bathroom.

Naruto and Sasuke stared at each other silently, not knowing what they should say to having slept in the same bed together, with their teammate.

"You can still stay here." Sasuke said eventually. "I can go buy a futon…"

Naruto's face turned tomato red. "Um. You don't have to. I mean, we do all fit on this bed pretty comfortably. Even with Sakura."

Sasuke cocked one eyebrow up and Naruto looked away in embarrassment.

"Sorry, forget I ever said anything, huh?"

"No, it's fine. I don't mind."

Sakura reentered the room. "Okay, boys. Budge over. I'm not leaving this bed again until we're summoned."

Naruto and Sasuke made room for Sakura, and she curled up against both of them.

"Um… isn't this a little awkward?" Naruto asked shyly.

Sasuke shook his head. "Not particularly. It's very common for two teammates to marry, and just as common for all three to be in a relationship. I used to see my family members cuddling up with their teams. Even… even He did for a while, until he made ANBU."

"Oh." Naruto said, surprised that Sasuke had talked about his family at all, and at the information that what they were doing was normal.

Sakura sprawled out across both of them, breaking them from their thoughts. "Yeah. Mum and dad used to be ninja, so I used to see their teammate all the freaking time. I still see Auntie Aiko sometimes, when mum and dad start fighting. For some reason, she's the only one who can get them to shut up and make up."

"Whoa, I didn't know your parents were ninja!" Naruto yelped, "Why'd they quit?"

"Mum quit because she and dad had me, and dad quit because mum was worried about him." she paused. "Well, I say quit. You never really quit, just stop taking missions. I think they'll put on their old vests again, though, with that big attack yesterday and all."

Sasuke listened to his teammates, silently enjoying contact with people who liked him just the way he was.

.

.

.

The Hokage looked over Ibiki's request carefully.

After a moment, he asked, rather dryly, "why should I give you three Chunin who have the potential to be the next Sanin, Ibiki?"

"I apologize for my rudeness, but don't you remember what happened to the last Sanin, Hokage-sama?" Ibiki replied sarcastically.

The Hokage grimaced. "But why T&I?"

"Exactly _because_ of their potential to become the next Sanin. I believe that by next year, they could be powerful enough to track down Itachi. Another year or so, and they'll be powerful enough to track down Orochimaru. Naruto still wants to be Hokage, right? Being the one to bring Orochimaru to justice will sway a lot of people in his favor. Sasuke can get vengeance for his family's death, and under legal circumstances. And Sakura just wants to be the most powerful kunoichi, so leaving her with those two will get her there."

The Hokage stared in surprise. "You've given this a lot of thought."

"I have." Ibiki confirmed.

Slowly, to give himself time to think, the Hokage took a puff from his pipe.

Ibiki waited patiently.

The Hokage sighed. "I would say 'only if their Jonin instructor signs off', but they're no longer Genin. So, yes. But if and only if they agree to it."

Ibiki grinned wickedly.

"Without any sort of coercion, Ibiki. And don't send Anko after them either." The Hokage scolded. "I want them to decide for themselves, do you understand me?"

Ibiki saluted and Body Flickered away.

The Hokage sighed. "Damn it, Ibiki…"

.

.

.

Team Seven had yet to leave Sasuke's bedroom.

Sakura and Kitty were dozing in the bed, curled up in Sasuke's lap together. Sasuke was reading a book on seals that Naruto had tossed onto the bed while he was searching for wood and tools to make himself a prosthetic leg, and Naruto was sitting on the floor and making himself a prosthetic leg.

A knock echoed through the house.

Sasuke groaned and dislodged Sakura gently, trying to not wake her up. Sakura tended to attack first when woken up suddenly.

"Scream if it's someone trying to kidnap you!" Naruto called quietly.

Sasuke flicked him off and ignored his childish snickering.

"Ibiki-san?" Sasuke greeted. "Are we being summoned?"

"No, but I came here to ask you and your team something. Is your team here?" Ibiki asked, peeking over Sasuke's shoulder.

Sasuke eyed him warily, but answered truthfully.

"Ah. May I come in?"

Sasuke stepped aside sourly. "If you must."

"Hey, what's he doing here?" Naruto asked, keeping his voice as low as he could to avoid waking Sakura and Kitty. "Aw, man, we don't have to go help rebuild do we? I'm injured and I don't want to be left out!"

"No, everyone who fought off the sound shinobi are being given a day off to recuperate. No, I came here to talk to you three about going into the Torture and Interrogation department." Ibiki chuckled. He paused. "Do you want me to wake Sakura?"

Naruto nodded vigorously. Sasuke agreed.

Ibiki walked over, and violent shook Sakura's shoulder and backpedaled, narrowly avoiding the kunai slashed straight at his face. "Good morning, kiddo."

"Ibiki-sempai?" Sakura yawned. "What are you doing here?"

"Came to offer you three a spot in the T&I department, kiddo." Ibiki answered, stepping back to stand where he had been before while Sakura sat up to listen.

"What do we get out of this, Ibiki-san?" Sasuke asked politely.

Ibiki smirked.

Sakura saw his smirk and got a little anxious. When Ibiki smirked, it meant he had a surprise up his heavy trench coat sleeve, and his surprises could go either way on the sliding scare of awesome versus evil.

"Sasuke, you could kill your brother completely legally, and get paid for it." Ibiki said serenely.

Sasuke was immediately at attention.

Ibiki turned to Naruto. "Your chances at becoming Hokage increase tenfold."

Naruto perked up.

"And kiddo, just by being on this team, you have the perfect chance to become even greater than Tsunade."

Sakura acquired a thoughtful expression.

Ibiki leaned back and waited while the three of them processed the information he had given them.

Naruto poked Sasuke's leg, and tilted his head to the side in question.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes, and slumped his shoulders.

"Hey!" Sakura barked.

Both boys looked at her, and she glared at them.

Sasuke blinked. "You're sure?"

Sakura nodded.

"Me too!" Naruto blurted. "I'm so in."

Sasuke shrugged. "Alright, Ibiki-san. We'll do it."

Ibiki was impressed. Most teams, having been together even twice as long as Team Seven has, can't usually communicate silently, without any hand signs.

"Well, whenever you're ready to start your Torture and Intelligence training, come on by Headquarters. Aiko will get you set up." Ibiki explained.

"Auntie Aiko works in T&I?"

"Aiko-sensei works in T&I?"

Sakura and Sasuke looked at each other.

"How do you know Auntie Aiko?" Sakura asked.

"How do you know Aiko-sensei?"

Ibiki rolled his eyes. "I'll take my leave, then."

"She's my parent's old teammate. I said that earlier!" Sakura protested.

Sasuke glared. "I told you Aiko was my teacher during the wave mission when Kakashi-sensei asked us who taught us how to wall walk."

Naruto groaned loudly, interrupting their argument and startling both of them. "Guys, guys, come on! Can we just relax for a little while longer, please? I get it, you both know this Aiko person. Are we done, huh?"

Sakura sighed. "I was just surprised, that's all, Naruto. I didn't mean to start an argument, Sasuke."

Sasuke nodded shortly, accepting her apology and apologizing at the same time.

"Thank you. Could one of you please toss me that roll of sandpaper?"

.

.

.

END CHAPTER FIVE

3776


End file.
